want to do.
Then, just as Kate was preparing to make up an elaborate story, Louise got it, in a crash of realization that turned her face red.
“All right, fine,” Louise said rapidly. “We shouldn’t have gotten worried, anyway. Like our parents, aren’t we, Frank! You should take Olive for her walk now. She’s going to pee in the corner.”
Frank said, “But she already—”
Louise glared at him. Frank gave a little aah of understanding and shooed Olive out the door. Kate wanted to head for her room, but she had the feeling she wasn’t off the hook yet. She scraped her hair back in a ponytail as Louise started tidying the kitchen. Lining up the pepper shakers, putting a spoon back in its container.
“Kate…” Louise adjusted a dish towel on the oven handle. “Are you sure this is the best idea?”
“Is what the best idea?”
Louise threw her a pained look. “Theo Brand.”
“I thought you liked him. You said he was nice at the party.”
“I do. I mean, I did. But he’s your employer. Your mother would—”
Kate flattened her hands against her thighs. “Louise,” she said, “I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you’re letting me stay here. But I’m an adult.”
Pink spots rose in Louise’s cheeks. “You’re also my niece, and I’m supposed to be watching you. You worked so hard to get this job. What if it ends badly? What if he fires you, or won’t give you a recommendation? What happens then?”
Anger bubbled in Kate’s throat. None of your business, she wanted to say. But of course it was, because she was living in Louise’s house. What she saved in rent, she paid for in obligation.
“I think it’s terrible that he took advantage of you like that,” Louise said. “Especially with what happened at your job in New York and—”
“Please stop.”
“You’re getting too wrapped up in that family.”
“Louise, stop!”
Her aunt fell silent. They sized each other up. Kate couldn’t tell if Louise was really concerned for her or if she just wanted to prove a point.
“I’m exhausted,” Kate said at last. “Can we talk about this later?”
Louise threw up her hands. “Fine.”
“Great. Thank you.” Kate made to march past. Louise stopped her.
“On your—” She broke off, gesturing to Kate’s collarbone. The hickey. Kate flushed and clapped her hand over her neck as she fled the room.
* * *
When Kate woke up for the second time that day, it was in fits and starts. Sleep clawed at her eyes. The sun had shifted and the room was stuffy. Her dream had been sickening Technicolor, a spinning carousel that left her dizzy and panting for breath. Tucked beneath her body, her left arm had gone completely numb. She fumbled for her phone and saw that it was almost noon. She had a missed call from her mom and twenty-three messages in a group text about a GIF of a panda sneezing. When she got out of bed, she tripped and caught herself against the sewing machine in the corner.
She had to get out of this place.
Louise had gone to yoga, thank God, but Frank was working on some gadget project in the living room. When Kate asked if she could borrow his car, he paused for a moment—she presumed that hesitation meant that Louise had filled him in on the fight—then nodded.
In the car, she smeared concealer across her hickey. It only left a bigger pink patch across her neck, as if she had developed a strange rash.
Although she had planned to go to the beach or one of the other small towns scattered around the area, she found herself heading south on the coastal route, the sea shining at her back. She drove past the Muir Woods turnoff, the Mill Valley exit, until she was joining the sluggish line of cars marching south on the 101. The traffic made her angry. She wanted to drive fast, she wanted to flee.
Images of the previous night kept coming back to her. Theo bending over her. Her stomach quivering. The gentle kiss he had placed on her hip. The next one, on the inside of her thigh.
The memory of the sweetness caused her physical pain. Theo had cut a flap out of her, unveiled her. Plenty of people could be vulnerable like that, could gaze down at their dissected self and marvel at what they were learning. Kate wasn’t like that. She needed a layer between. Already she wished there were a way to cover back over the parts he had