like. Despite feeling angry, I ponder asking my mum … or should I say Aunt Stella, for more information. As I have this internal debate, I take out my phone, surprised to see a text already waiting from an unknown number.
I open it up, and staring at me is a photo of a man in uniform who I immediately recognize as my dad. He’s standing next to a woman who I realize must be my mother. She’s absolutely beautiful. She has the same blonde hair and blue eyes as me, but also the same as Stella who I can definitely see in my mother. She’s smiling and looking at my father adoringly. He, in turn, is looking at her with complete love and devotion. She looks to be pregnant by about six months or so and is protectively cradling her stomach. A lump fills my throat as I stare at the only memory captured of my mother and father together. After a while of staring, I manage to pull myself away from the image to read what she has to say.
I know you must have questions. To save you asking, I thought I would send you this. Now you can see what your mother looked like. She was a bit of an attention seeker—much like someone else I know. ;)
I gasp at the last line of her text. She’s being a total bitch, obviously thinking that adding a wink emoticon at the end makes it alright. It doesn’t make it alright. Fuming, I close the message noticing there’s another from her. I’m rooted in complete, silent shock as I read it next.
You can’t deny that you have a much better life than some. I must have done something right. Listen, we’re all we have left, you and me. Maybe in time, when I’m back with Jake, we can move on and be a part of each other’s lives again. We are, after all, family.
I can feel my cheeks reddening as anger envelops me. “What a fucking bitch!”
That gets Jessie’s attention. “Who’s a fucking bitch?”
I immediately show her the text messages, seeing the moment she’s read them when her mouth draws into a hard line. “What a fucking bitch.”
A burst of laughter leaves me. “Like I said.”
She nods her head then points to Jake’s door. “You know you should show him these. He has a right to see what a conniving little witch she really is.”
I shake my head, not wanting to get involved. “I believe he already knows this. Besides, she’s having his baby now. Who am I to get in the way of that? Despite what I think of her, this baby should be their priority now. Not me.”
She nods her head in agreement. “True. I just feel he deserves to know what kind of mother she really was and is to you. I know she isn’t your real mother, but she agreed to bring you up. When she accepted that, she should have accepted the responsibilities that came with it. She’s one messed up, crazy bitch that one.”
I say nothing, neither agreeing nor disagreeing. If I think about it too much, then I’ll end up getting angry—which is what Stella wants. I know for a fact she doesn’t want to play happy families with me. She’s just saying that to wind me up because she knows, deep down, that I’m secretly head over heels with the man she says is the father of her baby. I inwardly groan at the thought. How messed up is this?!
“I better get on with some work. I’ve hardly done a thing all day.”
Jessie offers me a small smile and places her hand on my shoulder. “Are you okay?”
I shake my head. “To be honest, no. But I will be.” I force a smile. “I have to be.”
She swiftly nods her head and turns her chair to get on with her work. I then get back to what is left of my working day, but my heart is not in it. I’m glad when the hour turns to five o’clock so I can go home—away from the close proximity of Jake and the shittiness of this day.
Before finishing up, I try and see if I can find any more information about my mother. I find a form online where I fill in all her details but feel disheartened when I see that ten years after a death, they destroy all the records. With a deep, determined breath, I carry on searching for anything