doorknob, walking through. I close the door behind me, silencing the outside office noise. Jake looks up with his piercing green eyes that always somehow manage to burrow deep into my soul.
“What the fuck happened?” Thinking he’s talking about what he saw between Michael and me, I’m about to explain when he starts talking again. “I’ve been going out of my mind with worry. I saw what you were looking at on your computer and have been trying to call you ever since. Did you see your mom?” He immediately rises to walk around his desk to me, but he halts when I back away. I see the moment hurt and resignation hit his face.
“Please, Jake, you need to hear something.”
He stands still for a moment and studies me. “Okay, what do you need to say?”
He remains standing silently, patiently waiting for my response. “Stella is not my mother, she’s my aunt.”
He looks slightly shocked, but there’s also definite evidence that he saw this coming. “Why didn’t she ever tell you?”
I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know. A part of me is angry that she never did, but another part of me is a little relieved.”
He frowns. “Why?”
I wring my hands together, hurt coursing through me at the knowledge of what I’m about to say. “Because I don’t want to believe that a mother would treat her child the way she treated me.”
I see the pity in his eyes as his face softens. “Oh, Ana.” He makes a move to take me in his arms, but I stop him with my hand. I don’t need his pity. What I do need is to remind myself why he can never touch me again. “Please don’t. I can’t be with you knowing you could be making a family with a member of my own.”
“The baby’s not mine,” he growls.
I look into his eyes. “How can you know that for certain? She seems convinced that the baby is yours, and you yourself admitted to being drunk the night she may have conceived. Until the time comes to know for sure, you’re going to be stuck in limbo. As it stands, you’re about to become a father, and as much as it pains me, I can’t be the person who comes between that … I just can’t.”
When I finish speaking, he takes in a deep breath, and I can tell he’s having a debate in his head about what to say next. After a few uncomfortable beats of silence, he speaks. “I swear to you that I never touched her.”
I close my eyes, revealing a moment of vulnerability, and he takes that as his cue to move a little closer. I don’t have to open my eyes to know that he’s right in front of me. I can smell him.
I can feel him.
His presence swarms me … engulfs me … possesses me.
When I open my eyes, I suck in a breath at how close he really is. He notices my body’s blunder, and that’s the only encouragement he needs. He moves in that little bit more, and my legs start to tremble with anticipation. Why does he always have this effect on me?
As I stay frozen, he grabs both my arms and holds me. I can’t move, unable to react apart from my heart beating loudly in my ears.
“I can’t live without you,” he whispers softly, trailing his hand up to my face before threading his fingers through my hair. He moves his head close to mine, and my breath hitches. I close my eyes again, surrendering to the moment. This one blissful moment when I allow myself to be in his arms. Allow him to touch me, caress me … hold me like he used to. I feel the fires raging as he pulls his head back and leans in to kiss me.
“Nothing has to change.”
That’s all it takes to snap me out of it.
Feeling angry, I pull away, breaking the spell he’s cast me under. “How can you say this doesn’t change anything? You may be having a baby with my aunt—who only two hours ago I thought was my mother. Not to mention you ignored me when I came home that night. I was pleading with you to look at me, and you just ignored me.”
He flinches at my words and backs off. I see the pain in his eyes, and it makes me realize just how easy things could be if I just accepted everything that’s happened and moved on.