ever seen it, but the mother on the show is extremely loving, yet she can be claustrophobic, almost stifling, with her love.
“Mom! How are you?” I said.
“How am I? I’m fine, my Flynnagin! How are you, baby?!” she said, kissing my cheeks. I wanted to give her the usual Stop, Mom! but I missed her so much and it was comforting. My nightmare lingered and I was still unsettled.
“I’m okay. To be honest, I’m freaked out. I mean, it’s been hard to take all this in.”
“Oh, believe me,” she said. “As soon as I heard you were awake again, I couldn’t believe it. This was the longest you were inside.”
“The longest I was inside?”
“Well, that’s how Dr. Cross always put it for me. Whenever I would come by to check up on you, she would express you were still inside . . . your mind. Confined to the delusion. So I would play my part.”
“What do you mean ‘play your part’?” I asked her.
“Well, honey,” she said as she continued crying, and this cry was even more sad than before, “even though you weren’t here, I could still be your mother, there . . . in the supermarket. That’s what Mia does when she visits you as well.”
“So Mia really does visit me? But why?”
“Because she loves you, you idiot,” she said with a smile.
“Even after all this time? After everything I did? After two years of being a basket case?”
“Flynn, you’re a good young man and she loves that man deep down. The man who Frank buried. And I’ll admit it’s hard because . . .” She grabbed a tissue and continued, “This isn’t the first time you’ve awakened. And the thought of losing you is too much to bear for us all.”
“When did you talk to her?” I asked.
“After Dr. Cross called, she was the first person I let know. But enough of this, let’s eat some breakfast.”
Instead of bombarding her with more questions—questions I’d probably asked her a hundred times by now—I decided to drop it and just spend some quality time together.
After getting out of bed and brushing my teeth, we headed to the cafeteria. My mother told me to find a table and that she would grab the food.
“Coffee, coffee, coffee,” Joe said as I walked past him.
And like clockwork, Ann approached me and plopped five pills in my hand and handed me a paper cup of water. After drinking the water, she bid me a good day. I spit out the pills, placed them in the right pocket of my brown jacket, and continued on my way.
“Up for a game, Flynn?” I heard a voice say from behind me. It was old man Red, sitting in front of his chessboard.
“I don’t know how to play,” I said.
“Ah, horseshit, of course you do. I taught you myself.”
Not sure exactly how to process this, I sat down and surveyed the board.
“Whites first,” said Red.
“Hey, man, no need to bring race into this,” I said.
“I’m talking about the pieces, boy. White pieces move first, then my red pieces go. Your move.”
Not even trying to come up with a joking reply, I just moved, picking up a pawn and placing it forward two spaces.
“So, we’ve done this before, huh?” I asked.
“Oh, yeah,” Red said with a half smile, his eyes locked on the board, trying not to break his concentration.
“I ever beat you?” I said.
“Well, no, not yet you haven’t. Not at the game I’m playing.”
“So, are we . . . friends? I mean, you seem like a nice guy.”
“Yeah, kid, we’re friends. Been friends longer than you realize, apparently.” He leaned over, patting me on my shoulder.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“You just did,” he said, moving his horse forward two spaces and one space to the left.
“Why are you here?” I asked. “You don’t look like you belong here.”
“Truth be told, young man, I don’t belong here. But I don’t belong in the outside world either.”
“Well, what the hell is that supposed to mean, Yoda?” the smart-ass in me replied.
“Me and you, we came here for the same reason,” he said.
“How long have we known each other?” I asked.
“Olivia brought you to me about three months after you were first admitted. So I’d say about a year and a half.”
“What do you mean, she brought me to you?”
“Well, you see, kid, we’ve got similar issues, similar conditions. For years I lived bouncing between two worlds. There was my ‘reality,’ then there was reality. I’d loop between