“I’m not your buddy, Avery. I’m a guy who’s painfully attracted to you, and no matter what I do or say, it changes nothing. Every time I hear your door open it’s another man taking out the woman I want. I can’t do this anymore. You won’t even give me a chance.”
“The reason I won’t go anywhere with you is because to you it would be a date, when to me it would be nothing more than friendship.”
“I told you I don’t date, Avery. Why can’t we just have fun and leave the labels out of it.”
“I don’t know you, but I know that’s a lie. You wouldn’t care this much if you were just after sex. You want something more than that and I can’t give it to you. It wouldn’t work between us.”
“How do you know?”
I drew in a deep breath, hiding my emotions far below the surface. I didn’t know, but I also didn’t want to be so forgettable that a man could fuck me and forget me. “I just know.”
His eyes narrowed. “If life’s so damn predictable, then why do you need so much control?” He shook his head. “You won’t even admit you’re attracted to me and I know you are. We have chemistry, and I’m not buying that it’s one-sided. We might work as a couple, and that’s what scares you. At least I’m open-minded enough to consider the possibility.”
“Open minded? You just went from claiming you don’t date to talking about us as a possible couple. Which is it?”
“I don’t know! But the unknown excites the fuck out of me, especially when it has to do with you.” He ran a hand through his hair and shifted his glare away as if regretting his words. “You’re under my skin, and I can’t get you out. Maybe if we just tried…”
“Noah, please. I’m not going to date you, and I’m not going to fuck you. We’re friends, and that’s it.”
His jaw locked hard enough that the muscles bulged under the stubble. His nostrils flared. “This…” He waved a finger between us. “This can’t go on. I hate it.”
I never meant to cause him this much stress. “If you got to know me better, you’d see I’m not right for you. If we could just try being friends—”
His glare returned to me, penetrating and cutting off my words. “You have plenty of empty relationships with—” air quotes “—friends.”
“What are you saying?” I’d assumed this was a game to him, but the stress showed in his eyes. Maybe he still didn’t feel well enough for this conversation.
“I… I don’t know.” He forked his fingers through his hair again. “I don’t want to be one more meaningless relationship in your life, Avery. I want to be the one who gets all your attention, at least until we figure out what this is between us.”
My head shook. Keeping up with his Jekyll and Hyde desires gave me whiplash. In a small voice, I said, “Two minutes ago you said it was just—”
His hand cut through the air. “That was then. This is now.” His gaze locked with mine, sharp and challenging. “I’m laying it all on the table. I want you—as more than a friend and possibly for more than one night. I don’t know how to shut it off, and I’m tired of acting like it’s some passing phase.” His arms spread, exposing his palms. “I’m putting it all out there, Avery. No more games. Just say yes, and we can figure out what this is once and for all.”
My heart raced, and I felt myself shrinking inside. He was too forward, too attractive, and too self-assured. I’d never have control of him and the thought of giving up my neatly controlled life terrified me. He lived twenty feet from my fragile world, and too much tampering could leave everything in pieces.
Folding my arms around my waist, I dropped my gaze to the floor. “We’re just neighbors, Noah. I’m just a temporary piece of furniture in your world, and in a minute I’ll be gone.”
He shook his head. “No, Avery, you’re this accidental shift I didn’t expect, and no matter how much I try to ignore your presence in the fray of my day to day life, you’ve totally consumed my thoughts. There’s a reason for that. There’s a reason I find myself zoning out in business meetings trying to picture the exact shade of your eyes.”
His words surprised and delighted me, but they also scared me.