it. I’d rather they were distracted.
The more distracted they were, the better my chances at taking advantage of all the comings and goings.
Outside, the cold wind blew and snow kissed the ground. It was almost postcard picturesque, even in the barren garden populated by my black-feathered friends each time I stepped out.
The garden, like the bathing room, had become a private domain. No guests ventured out. Guards had been stationed.
Those were annoying. But they didn’t speak to me. In fact, they never even looked at me.
So they weren’t there to keep me in so much as to keep others out.
Warm hands settled on my shoulders. “Fiona…”
I turned my head slightly, catching him in my periphery but saying nothing.
“I know you’re unhappy.”
Not a newsflash.
“And I cannot make up to you my broken word.”
No, he really couldn’t.
“But I promise, now that you have transitioned, it will get better.”
“You shouldn’t promise,” I told him, and then took a step away from his grip. To my surprise, he let me go. “You cannot offer any promise that Alfred is guaranteed to keep, nor Rogue for that matter.”
“They do not rule,” Maddox said. “Over others, yes, but not over us.”
I snorted, but I turned to face him and folded my arms. It was better than exploring the strange tug to look after his feelings. The rawness in his eyes cut me. “If that were true, then you would have made sure I could leave after you three told me your tale and I said I wanted to go.”
Chin dipping, he said, “The circumstances were different then.”
“Oh?” I raised my eyebrows. “So if I want to walk out the door right now? Would you stop me?”
His lips compressed. “You wouldn’t get far.”
It wasn’t a yes or a no.
“You have to understand…”
“No,” I told him simply. “I don’t.” But I understood more than he realized. Maybe more than any of them realized. Just because I’d avoided vampires for more than casual fun and feeding didn’t mean I failed to understand them. They thrived on power and politics. The power in blood, and the games in politics. They loved to manipulate and control.
Alfred was far older than any vampire I’d ever met. It wasn’t that he lusted for power. No, he was power. Disobedience just didn’t register with him. Arrogant asshole.
“You truly hate us, don’t you?” The sadness in Maddox’s voice plucked my heartstrings, but I ignored that discordant sound. The dragon shouldn’t have picked me in the first place.
“Yes.” It wasn’t entirely true, but I still meant it. A muscle ticked in Maddox’s jaw, and he didn’t call me on the fib.
So maybe he didn’t sense it.
Good.
I’d been practicing diligently for days. Betray nothing. Not my thoughts. Not my feelings. Nothing. Let them see what they wanted to see.
“I understand,” he murmured, then met my gaze. “I will make this right with you. I will earn your forgiveness.” It was another pledge.
“I told you. No promises.” Time for a change of subject. “I suppose you all expect me to wear this tonight?”
“If you do not like it, we can find you something else.” Poor dragon. He was truly trying, and I was the bitch who didn’t want him to succeed.
“It’s fine,” I told him, cutting a hand through the air. Then against my better judgment, I asked, “Why aren’t you down there taking offerings with everyone else?”
Save for Eleanor, I hadn’t seen him taking blood from any of the so-called offerings. Alfred was always there. I suspected Rogue was there as well, ever Alfred’s shadow, which in and of itself was odd. Rogue had seemed the power here before Alfred awoke.
Fin? He’d been amongst the crowd, but I’d never lingered to see if he took any libations. Maddox hadn’t, of that I was almost dead certain. The only times I’d seen him in that hall had been when he followed me, and then he’d stayed with me as I weaved my way along the fringes of the crowd.
I never stuck around. I didn’t want their offerings or their blood.
Instead of answering me, he turned and walked toward the doors of my suite. But rather than exit, he closed them and pressed a hand to the doors. There was a whisper of sound and a small flash, just like when we’d been in the cell. Nostalgia crawled through me at an alarming rate.
I needed to shut that shit down.
Turning, he faced me. “The offerings are because of who Alfred is. They offer to all of us because he