didn't know how I could even begin to articulate what I felt inside of me. I just shook my head and continued backing. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry...I'm just not ready."
Roman sprang to his feet in one graceful motion. He took a step toward me. "Georgina..."
But I was already moving away, off to the safety of my bedroom. I slammed the door behind me - not from anger, but from a desperate need to stay away from him. From the hall, I heard him call my name and feared he'd come in anyway, despite my refusal to answer. I had no lock, and even if I did, it wouldn't stop him. He said my name a few more times, and then silence fell. I think he returned to the living room, backing off and giving me my space.
I flung myself onto the bed, gripping the sheets tightly and trying not to cry. That horrible despair that plagued me so often filled me now. It was an old friend, one that I would never be able to leave. All my relationships - friends and lovers - were a mess. I was either hurting them, or they were hurting me. There was no peace for me. There never would be, not for this servant of Hell.
And then, through that horrible, clenching pain inside me, I felt the lightest of touches. A whisper. A breath of music, of color, of light. I lifted my head up from where I'd buried it in my pillow and stared around. There was nothing tangible, not exactly, but I could sense it all around me: that warm, comforting siren song. It had no words, yet in my despair, I could hear it perfectly. It was telling me I was wrong, that I could have peace. And not just that - I could have comfort and love and so much more. It was like arms beckoning to me, a mother welcoming home a long-lost child.
I slowly rose from my bed, moving toward that which had no form. Come, come.
Outside my door, I heard Roman shout my name, but the tone was different from before. This wasn't confusion or pleading. It was frantic and concerned. The sound was grating to my ears as I stepped closer to that beautiful warmth. It was home. It was an invitation. All I had to do was accept.
"Georgina!" The door blew apart, and Roman stood there, blazing with power. "Georgina, stop - "
But it was too late. I had accepted.
All that joy and protection wrapped around me, taking me into its arms.
The world dissolved.
Chapter 10
I woke to blackness. Blackness and suffocation.
I was in a small room, a box really, crammed in so tightly that my arms wrapped around me and my knees were drawn to my chest. Weirdly, my limbs seemed too long. My whole body did, actually. My body changed all the time with shape-shifting, but this wasn't what I'd been wearing with Roman. This was different. For a moment, that horrible space seemed to close in around me. I couldn't breathe. With great effort, I tried to calm myself down. There was enough air. I could breathe. And even if I couldn't have, it wouldn't have mattered. The fear of suffocation was a human instinct.
Where was I? I didn't remember anything after the bedroom. I recalled the light and the music and Roman bursting in too late. I'd felt his power build up, like he was about to take action, but I hadn't seen the conclusion. And now, here I was.
Before my eyes, two identical luminescent forms suddenly appeared, like torches being lit in the darkness. They were tall and thin, with willowy, androgynous features. Black cloth wrapped around their bodies, seeming to glow with a light of its own, and long black hair flowed from their heads, blending in and losing itself in the cloth. Their eyes were a startling radioactive blue, too blue for any human, and seemed to bug out of those long, pale faces that were neither male nor female.
It was weird too because it was like they stood before me in a large room, as though they were ten or so feet away from me. Yet, I was still crammed into the confines of my box and its unseen walls, barely able to move. Aside from them, everything else was pure, unfathomable blackness. I couldn't even see my own body or any other features of the room. My brain couldn't get a grip on this spatial