“I’m not a girl, and I’m not mixed up,” I said. Aldi Birch and Rudy laughed at that until the judge called for order, and I’ll admit I was warm with pleasure to find myself back in the fold.
We were released on our own recognizance and told to report back in a week.
“Don’t worry too much,” Aldi said on our way out. “Not all those charges are going to stick. I doubt they can prove you were drunk and resisting. Plead, pay a fine, do some community service, it’ll go away in one year, maybe two.”
“What counts as community service?” asked Rudy. “Does planting fruit trees count?”
“I wouldn’t push it,” said Aldi Birch. They laughed again.
“That white oak out front of your place still need pruning?” Rudy asked. “I don’t think it has another winter in it, not without crushing you.”
“The answer’s still no,” Aldi said. “Hands off that oak.”
“Now, don’t get defensive,” Rudy said. “Call me up if you ever feel like seeing another living soul.”
We swiped some thin coffee on the way out and walked back through the morning neighborhoods to retrieve Rudy’s truck.
* * *
The principal’s yard was empty, the six fruit trees gone, the holes filled back in, Rudy’s defiant boot marks swept away. The principal, that hard worker, had even sprinkled new grass seed, though it wasn’t yet noon. Rudy shook his head, and we sat in the truck with the radio on, drinking our coffee while the kids across the street screamed and beat one another, launched themselves from monkey bars onto their fellows, aimed rubber balls at one another’s heads. That was if you were included.
“At least we came out ahead,” said Rudy.
“How can you say that?” I asked. “Did you hear all those charges? Besides, most people got rid of the trees we planted.”
“Most but not all,” said Rudy. “There are now five more apple trees, three pears, and six cherry trees gracing this godforsaken town. And they’re doing well. They’re probably going to make it.” He took a sip of coffee. “I don’t know about you, but I could use something stronger. What time is it? Want to hit the bar?”
“I still have my standards, Rudy,” I said.
“Of course,” he said. “I’ve got to remember to look up bourgeoisie in the dictionary more often.”
In fact, I might have gone to the bar, the day was so disarranged already, but at that moment I saw Perley across the street, leaning hard against the fence. He waved at us as if he were adrift in an open boat, our truck the only airplane in a barren sky. We went right over.
“You want some coffee?” asked Rudy, holding his cup up to the fence.
“It might stunt my growth,” said Perley.
“Old wives’ tales,” said Rudy.
“Mama K and Mama L said I shouldn’t bother you, but can I ask you one question?” Perley said.
“Ask us anything you want, we’ve nothing to hide,” Rudy said.
“Hold on,” I said. “You can ask me one question if I can ask you one question, too.”
“What’s jail like?” asked Perley, his fingers curling around the chain link.
“Nothing to brag about,” I said.
“Cold, no private place to pee, bad food,” Rudy said. “But pretty much everyone else in there had it worse than us.” Perley nodded.
“My turn to ask a question,” I said.
“Okay, but only one,” Perley said.
“How is it really going here?” I asked. “I mean at school.”
“I told you it’s fine,” he said.
“Cut the bullshit,” I said. “What’s up with that little asshole Bexley Epps?”
Perley looked startled. “How did you know?” he asked.
“Adult omniscience,” I said.
“He calls me names,” Perley said. “I just can’t seem to mix in that good. Don’t tell Mama L and Mama K.”
“I’ve got an idea for your community service, Rudy,” I said.
“If you mean me teaching that little Epps punk a lesson, I don’t think the sheriff’s office will sign off on it,” Rudy said.
“Pick Perley up from school a few days a week with all the chain saws in the back of the truck,” I said. “Let the kids see him with you. Might just help matters. What do you think, Perley?”
“Won’t count as community service,” Rudy said.
“Go to the school office, they’ve got volunteer opportunities, mentoring shit, they always do. Sign up and make it official,” I said. “It’ll be like an internship.”
“An internship with a man,” Perley said. Rudy laughed and Perley joined in, his first real laugh since the school bus doors had closed behind