cuddle or spoon now. Hell, I don’t know. I’ve never done either one.
And I don’t plan to start now. Not with Angel. It’d mean something I’m not ready to admit. To her or to myself. Because once I do, that makes it real, and real things hurt. Especially when they’re taken away.
Rolling onto her side, Angel props her elbow on the mattress and tucks her chin in the palm of her hand. “Tell me something about yourself.”
“I hate popcorn.”
“I’m serious,” she laughs, lightly punching my ribs. “You never talk about anything personal. I just…” She frowns, her eyelashes fluttering to where I can barely see her eyes. “I want to know you, Dominic. Tell me about your family.”
For a brief second, I consider putting on my clothes and going back to my house. My life isn’t open for discussion or inspection. However, for the first time, I want to let someone in. I want to let them behind the ugly walls and past the barbed wire barricade.
“My mother was also an actress.” As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I want them back, but Angel rolls onto her stomach and props up on her forearms.
“Really?”
Nodding, I fold my arms behind my head. “She came to Hollywood at the ripe old age of sixteen.” I cast a sharp glance at her out of the corner of my eye. “Sound familiar?”
Her bright green eyes dim as she swallows what I assume is her pride. I’m not trying to be a dick. She wanted honesty, so I’m giving it to her. Nobody said it’d be pretty.
“She was innocent,” I continue, turning my gaze back toward the ceiling. “Just like most girls who come here with dreams of making it big. She met a director who took an interest in her. A real up and coming guy. When he talked, people listened.”
I have to pause here and take a few calming breaths. If I don’t, I’ll never get through this without putting my fist through the wall. Angel doesn’t say a word, and after a few silent moments, I continue. “He told her about a project he thought she’d be perfect for and instructed her to come in for a screen test.” I can’t help but spit the words out with venom.
Angel’s face falls. “Oh Dominic.”
But I can’t stop. I’ve kept the door to the past locked for so long, now that it’s been ripped open, thirty-two years of skeletons come pouring out. “Only when she got there, the screen test was behind closed doors. She was offered the part all right, but passing the test hinged more on her oral than acting skills.” I have no idea I’m shaking until Angel coils herself around me. “When Mom refused to suck his dick, he tried to rape her.”
She stills. “Oh my God.”
“Luckily, a production assistant interrupted, and Mom ran away. But the damage was done. He blackballed her. She couldn’t get an audition for a used car lot commercial much less a movie. She got a job at a deli and worked a few other odd jobs here and there, but eventually the pressure was too much for her. She cracked.”
She lifts her cheek from my chest. “What do you mean, ‘she cracked’?”
This is what I meant. The part that steals at least an hour from the countdown clock. An hour lost I’ll never have with her. But what’s done is done, so I hold her stare as I watch more time slip away. “She lost it, rook. Something up there snapped. Reality and fantasy switched roles and never switched back.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
Angel
I look away from his hardened stare, afraid he’ll see the fear in mine. “Maybe it can be switched back.”
“Yeah right,” he snorts, but there’s no amusement there, only raw hurt. “That’s why we never stayed in one place. Mom was convinced people were trying to kill us.”
“What people?”
“Aliens? The FBI? The people in the toothpaste commercials?” He rolls his eyes. “Who the hell knows? At ten years old, I was too busy hustling the streets, doing whatever I had to just to keep both of us from starving to death to care.”
My heart breaks thinking of little Dominic, alone on the streets of Hollywood. “I can’t imagine what you—”
“Don’t feel sorry for me.” He sits up and moves to the edge of the bed, his back to me. “We survived, and I turned out just fine. In the end, people got what they deserved.”
I know this part thanks to