We speak for a few minutes. Jon doesn’t think he can afford the place by himself and wants to see if I will still pay my share of the bills the last month even if I’m not there. Money. That’s what he had been concerned about. I have no desire to fight and agree. Before he leaves, he tells me he will start sleeping on the couch. That makes sense; no reason to still share a bed. After he goes back into the front room, I pull my knees up into my chest and rock back and forth slowly. My mind is telling me I should be crying but no tears come. It's more of a “what just happened?” feeling. I'm scared I don't know how to be around him for the next two weeks. I want to say I feel relieved but I don’t. If anything, I feel numb.
I pull out my laptop and type an email to my manager explaining that my grandmother has asked me to move to Florida, and since she is my last remaining relative, I feel it is something that I should do and that I need to give my two weeks’ notice. The email address is my boss's personal email so I’m not surprised when my phone starts ringing thirty minutes later. I have worked in that doctor's office longer than I have dated Jon. My manager is worried I’m making a rash decision and is calling more as a friend than an employer.
We talk for over an hour. I tell her all about Florida and my grandmother. I tell her about learning I had an uncle and how he had died. It’s when I talk about Kate and the relationship we're forming that Kim, my manager, gets it. Kim had been there for me after the deaths of my parents, and while she doesn’t know everything that has been going on with Jon, she suspected something was wrong. When I tell her that Jon told me I should go Kim isn’t surprised. Kim admits that during the time Jon had been unemployed she had almost told me to kick him out. The one thing I don’t tell Kim about is Ryan. It feels like it will take something away from moving close to be with family if I admit I also have a crush on my grandmother’s hot neighbor.
Kim is sad that I’m leaving but accepts my notice, saying that she will put together an office going away party for me. I feel a weight lifted knowing that I won’t be leaving my office awkwardly. I've worked there almost four years. I'll not miss flu season, but I will miss my coworkers, especially Kim and Nikita. I ask Kim not to say anything until I tell Nikita myself. Kim agrees and says once Nikita knows she will send an email out to the office. I have to laugh when Kim starts saying she’s going to miss me. I remind her that I've not left yet.
When I hang up, I walk to the kitchen, suddenly hungry. Jon is on his cell phone when I come out. He sees me then puts on his coat to finish his call outside. That’s another thing we'll have to figure out, I think, annoyed he feels he has to leave the room to talk to someone. He's on my phone plan. I have been thinking about changing providers anyway because I don't want to deal with having to share data, and our phones are already out of contract. I make myself a sandwich and wait for Jon to come back in. When he does, I tell him I'll be turning off our phones before I leave. Jon replies that he had figured as much and says a friend is on his way to pick him up.
"Will you be back by dinner?"
"Probably not."
Jon takes a shower and gets dressed so he can be ready to go. Where, I don’t know. It’s not my business to know where he goes anymore. After he leaves, I decide I want to make the meatloaf anyway. I can eat the leftovers at work, and it will remind me of Florida. Once it's in the oven, I call my grandmother back. Something about her phone makes it hard for Kate to hear me. Kate asks if it would be alright if I call Ryan instead, and he can relay the message. She gives me his number. Considering