therapy to fix himself? To fix his issues?
Words—that was all he was giving me. Empty, meaningless words to try to pull me back into his web of destruction. Truthfully, I was tired of it all. I was tired of him belittling me, tired of him hurting me.
A part of me figured Laura had told Penn that to work as karma. She knew I would be gone and that he therefore had no way of getting a commission from her. It felt like a slight ‘girl power’ moment, and I wished I could’ve hugged her for it.
My phone began ringing again, and Penn’s name popped up against the screen again.
I picked it up and blocked it.
I had nothing else to say to the man who’d made me feel so small during the hardest days of my life. Laura was right—that is not how a husband is meant to treat his wife.
I was never going to allow a man to treat me that way again.
“I miss you and want to come home,” Yoana said, just seconds after I called her. It had been a few days since we’d last talked because she and Nathan were hiking in South America with little reception. I gave her a quick update on life in Havenbarrow, the magic that was blue moon, and every detail about Jax Kilter, along with my phone call from Penn.
“I miss you too, but you’ll be back in about a month or so, and then we can find our new normal.”
“With your new boyfriend slash old best boyfriend,” she cooed, making me laugh.
“He’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a boy who’s a friend,” I said, sounding so much like I had when we were kids and Yoana would mock me about my connection with Jax. “Besides, I’m still legally married to Penn.”
“Screw him, the asshole. I can’t believe he tried to drag you back into his life to make a deal. I’m a million percent certain he was planning on kicking you to the curb the moment he got his money. He’s a loser who doesn’t deserve you, but it sounds like this Jax guy does. So let’s talk more about him.”
Just thinking about Jax set my cheeks on fire. He was so gentle with me, and kind. He listened to my hopes and dreams, he allowed me to talk about Daisy, and when I needed to cry, he didn’t call me emotional. He didn’t tell me I was too much.
He listened, he consoled me, and he wiped away my tears.
Even before Daisy passed away, Penn had always undermined my emotions. Jax allowed them to soar and never seemed overwhelmed by anything I felt. That was freeing to me. When someone allows you to fully be who you are, you owe them all of your love.
“He’s really wonderful, Yoana. He went through some trauma when he was younger, so it’s nice to talk to someone who understands what it’s like to carry the guilt of an accident.”
She went quiet for a second, and I knew she was thinking something important.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Nothing.”
“Yoana, I know you the same way you know me—inside out. So, what’s the problem?”
“I just want to make sure Jax is whole, you know? I don’t want you to fall too quickly for someone who’s broken too.”
Broken too.
She thought I was broken. I didn’t know what to say to that.
“You really think I’m broken?” I asked, my voice shaky as a pit of nerves swarmed inside me.
“No, no! Not like that, Kenny. I just mean you’ve been through a lot. I don’t want you to feel as if you need to be drawn to someone else who has baggage.” The more she talked about it, the more she left me feeling uneasy. She sighed. “This isn’t coming out right.”
“No, it’s not. It’s odd, too, seeing how seconds ago you were just cooing over the idea of calling Jax my boyfriend.”
“That was before I knew he went through a major trauma. Look, I’m not trying to stop your happiness. If anyone in this world deserves it, it’s you. I’m just being a big sister, that’s all. It’s my job to protect you. All I’m saying is be careful with your heart. It’s been through a lot, and I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
Just like my previous call with Penn, I was being left with a nasty taste in my mouth. Here I was, finally finding my footing after so much struggle, and now my sister was