Another nurse shoves in next to mine and calls out into the room loudly, “Holley Fields?”
I bite my lip as Holley jumps to her feet next to me.
“Do you think they’re onto us?” I ask. She slugs me right in the kidney as she steps around me.
I wince and laugh at the same time, jumping into a walk that matches her pace. We walk elbow to elbow all the way to the door, her eyes flitting nervously back and forth between us the whole time. My nurse smiles at me, while hers narrows her eyes. Apparently, she finds it suspect that Holley is that twitchy.
Hoping to ease the awkwardness, I wrap an arm around Holley’s shoulder and pull her toward me, saying loudly enough for her nurse to hear, “No reason to be nervous, sweetheart.”
“What?” Holley asks, confused. I put my lips to her ear and smile as I whisper. “You look like a junkie right now, all fidgety. I’m helping you.”
“I’m only jumpy because you made me that way,” she hisses, and I laugh. Making a big show of it, I put my lips to her cheek and give her a kiss. Her eyes widen, but I take my arm away from her and say my goodbyes. “See you after, honey.”
She glares, but my nurse is apparently taken with the show. “Oh, nonsense. We’ve got rooms for you two right next to each other, don’t we, Cheryl?”
Cheryl, Holley’s nurse, finally starts to warm, agreeing, “Yeah, I think we do.”
“Great,” I say cheerfully. Holley looks absolutely miserable, but I can’t help it. It’s the good kind of miserable. The kind she’ll get over. The kind I always tell Chloe is the fun kind of embarrassment.
Holley
Jake Brent is literally in the room next door. They walked us down the hall together, handed me a cup, and requested that I go fill it with my urine, all while he was still within earshot.
Heaven help me, this day has not gone at all how I thought it would.
I didn’t expect to see him. I didn’t expect to see anyone. One does not go to the vagina doctor to have buddy time. One goes to the vagina doctor because they absolutely must to ensure reproductive health.
The thin paper of the gown on the bed feels like nothing against the air from the vent above my head, and the draft on all parts of my body only amplifies the acute awareness that I am seriously naked only a wall away from Jake.
And it was all his doing!
I’m pretty sure he was suffering some sort of psychotic break out there. Like, it’s good he’s in a doctor’s office at this point, but did he really have to be in the same one as me? In the room next door?
How am I going to handle the claw of death cranking open my vajayjay with him no more than a wall away? This isn’t normal. This isn’t something women should have to go through. Shouldn’t our doctor’s offices at least be keeping to their own halls?
There’s a knock on the door, and I have to admit, a part of me is hoping it’s the grim reaper, here to put me out of my misery.
Like, he and his sharp scythe aren’t that intimidating.
They’re even kind of friendly looking if you really think about it.
Alas, it’s not him when the door swings open. “Hey there,” my nurse greets, going over to my cup of warm pee and dipping a test strip in it with gloved hands. I look on as she lays it on top of protective plastic across the edge of the sink and waits for the results.
“Everything looks normal,” she says, sounding almost disappointed. “Not pregnant.”
Good. I’m glad. I’d really have to fucking worry if I’d somehow turned up pregnant without even coming close to having sex. Still, she looks like it’s not the best of news, so I make sure I nip that in the bud.
“That’s good.”
She smiles kindly as she heads for the blood pressure cuff. “You two aren’t ready to try?”
I laugh. Am I high on drugs? What in the world is going on here? “What two?”
“You and Jake.” She flashes a knowing, amused grin. “He’s too funny. He was just making jokes out in the hall. You’re a lucky girl.”
I roll my eyes. He’s like a charm explosion all over this place. I, apparently, had my force field engaged beforehand, though.