it’s chaos – doors opening and shutting, footsteps banging up and down the stairs, shouting, and that’s just Billy. Today there’s nothing, and it’s sufficiently strange enough to make me leave the bed.
I roll out of bed, and after a quick trip to the bathroom, I pull on an old pair of sweats that hang so low on my hips they’re practically indecent. Attired, if not adequately, I amble downstairs. My earlier impression is confirmed, as the house lies in a pool of sunny silence. It’s almost like one of those zombie films where the plucky hero doesn’t realise that he’s the only one around who isn’t gnawing on someone’s leg.
My head is so full of these thoughts that it accounts for why I issue a very high-pitched shriek when Asa materialises from the cupboard under the stairs.
“What the fuck?” I screech and pause to clear my throat before continuing in a much deeper voice than usual. “I mean, what are you doing?”
Asa stares at me. “What the hell was that about?”
“Zombies.”
As normal, he gets my randomness and nods wisely. “Ah. It’s too quiet.” He looks me up and down, his eyes catching on my hipbones and the thatch of my pubic hair showing above the very low-slung joggers. “If I were a zombie,” he says slowly, “I think I’ve found where I’d like to nibble first.”
I eye him. He’s wearing faded old jeans that cling lovingly to the lines of his legs and a denim shirt that’s surely as old as me. I frown at the big white dressing on his chest that’s peeping over the top of his shirt. Apparently, he’d been hit by a sword during shooting last week, and I hate that he was hurt. Then I come back to the conversation. “Maybe you’d like to explain why your zombie arse was rooting around in that cupboard first?”
He hums, looking a bit shifty. “Just looking for my black dress shoes.”
“Under the stairs?”
“Billy,” he says without any need for more explanation.
“He was playing giants the other day.” I look around. “Speaking of the devil, where is he?”
That shifty look crosses his face again, but before I can question him, he exclaims and, bending down, he comes up with his shoes. My mouth quirks at the Action Man sitting comfortably in them. “Did he come with the shoes when you bought them?” I ask lightly.
He sniffs. “They’d probably be more comfortable if I kept him in there while I was wearing them.”
I grimace sympathetically. My Asa does not like formal dress.
“Is there a premiere or something you’ve forgotten to tell me about?” I murmur.
He shakes his head. “No, I just need my grey suit.”
“Are you in court for soliciting again?” I ask mockingly. “If you’d only go back to acting school you could learn how to do it properly.” I twist away, laughing as he tries to tweak my nipples, and move towards the kitchen. “There is obviously something you’re hiding. I need tea before I start cross-examining you,” I shout.
I hear a groan. “Not cross-examining, Jude. The way you do it, I can’t keep anything back.”
I grin. I cross-examine naked. We, therefore, have no secrets between us.
My grin fades when I go into the kitchen to find it empty. There are cups and plates on the table, and the dishwasher rumbles gently. All the signs of occupation but no people. Okay, this is weird.
“Asa,” I shout. “Can you come here, please?”
A few minutes later he appears with two suits hanging from his long fingers, one of which appears to be my charcoal-grey Hugo Boss.
“What is going on?” I gesture around the kitchen. “It’s like the fucking Mary Celeste in here.”
He hangs the suits up neatly from the doorjamb and saunters in. “Finished your tea?” he asks, his voice deeper than usual, and something in the tenor of his voice alerts me to his intentions.
I laugh. “Shit. Here?”
He nods slowly. “I’ve wanted to fuck you on this table since I first met you. Unfortunately, I thought Peggy might give notice if I tried it at teatime.”
I throw my head back, laughing, but it dies when my head lowers and I catch the dark look on his face. “Really?”
He paces towards me, and it’s like being stalked by a huge lion. My cock stiffens immediately, and he smirks. “Looks like one part of you is on board with the idea. Let’s see if we can get the rest to agree.”
I smirk and back up slowly until my arse hits