been parted, and I’ve missed him so much. The house has been extraordinarily quiet without him, and it feels fancifully like the heart’s gone from our home. We’ve only been together for a year, and I still marvel at how much this gorgeous, gentle giant has taken over my life. The whole relationship had come as a bit of a surprise to me, considering I’d spent a lot of years redefining the word footloose.
After five minutes of all the passengers standing contorted into strange positions and trying not to catch each other’s eyes, the doors open and the line starts to move. I heft my bag and join the throng, willing them to move quickly.
Once through passenger control, I move quickly towards the doors, angling around slow-moving people with the ease of long practice. Finally, we emerge into the din of Dublin Airport, an assault on the ears. I edge along and then snort out a laugh as I see Asa’s assistant holding up a sign saying Ivor Biggun. I walk towards him, smiling widely.
“I think that might be me,” I say.
Jim lowers his sign and laughs, holding out his hand to shake mine. “Fuck me, Jude,” he says with his broad Irish accent. “It’s bloody good to see you.”
“Is it?” I ask curiously. I like Jim. He’s been Asa’s assistant since the beginning of filming this series and the two of them get along like a house on fire. He’s been to stay with us a few times and gone surfing. However, there’s a fervent note in his voice that catches my interest. “What?” I ask immediately.
He shakes his head, pasting a smile on his face. “Nothing. Everything’s fine.”
Hmm. I nod slowly, following him as he turns on his heel. “Is Asa filming?” I ask.
He looks back. “No. Not today.”
I stop dead. If he isn’t filming, where is he? He always comes to pick me up if he isn’t working, and I treasure that first moment when he sees me and his whole face lights up. It’s always a disappointment when he doesn’t come, but I’m a big boy. I understand commitments.
Jim, seeming to sense that I’ve stopped, turns back. “He stayed to help Hayden with his lines. The director pushed a script change on them this morning, and he asked Asa for help.”
I nod, thinking of the other actor. He plays a warrior in Asa’s character’s house, and last season I saw signs that the writers were beginning to write a love connection between the two men. Asa had confirmed it.
I hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but Hayden is gorgeous. He’s tall, almost as tall as Asa, and with his blond hair and patrician features, he’s an intriguing contrast to Asa’s dark masculinity. The thought of Hayden, combined with Jim’s odd attitude, sends tendrils of alarm drifting around my brain.
“That’s nice,” I say slowly, and Jim’s lips tighten. Yes. Something’s wrong.
I shake my head and start walking again. I trust Asa. Whatever is going on, I trust him. I tell myself that stoutly, and by the time I leave the airport I’ve nearly convinced myself.
Four hours later, that conviction is waning as I pace up and down the hotel suite for the five hundredth time. It’s a beautiful suite, and the hotel is wonderful and centrally located. The crew always stay here, and I’ve spent many very drunken weekends, as the bars and restaurants of Dublin are within walking distance. Today, however, it doesn’t seem half as charming when I’m on my own.
I wander over to the window, looking down onto the street. Once again, there’s no sign of him, and for the first time, anger kindles in my stomach. He knew I was coming. He knew the time of my flight. He hadn’t even been rostered onto work, and doing a favour for his friend has obviously taken precedence over spending time with me. All this when he’s been away for three weeks and is likely to be away for another couple.
I run my hands through my hair, feeling the anger grow, and suddenly my mind is made up. After putting on my jacket and my beanie and scarf, I scoop up the key and let myself out of the room. If Asa finds it so easy to miss spending time with me, then I’m not fucking waiting around for him like a little wife. I’ll go out and have a walk around Dublin, and he can fucking make the effort to find me