man in his late twenties or early thirties that he has to meet my parents before we go out is mortifying.
“Their house, their rules.” Blah, blah blah.
It’s not that I don’t appreciate my parents. I do. So much. Most parents think they’ll be done supporting their kids at 18, or perhaps, if they are really generous, after college. Mine helped me through law school the first time, didn’t freak out when I decided I needed a break, and are now supporting me once again.
They have to be wondering when it will all end as much as I am.
You’d think their daughter, who set her sights on becoming a lawyer, would have an easier time in the real world than their free-spirited son, who followed his pipe dream of becoming an author, but you’d be wrong.
Alex is a successful and loving family man. He’s every parent’s wet dream, aside from the whole murder suspect thing, but that only lasted for about a year, and it’s all cleared up now.
My best friend, Molly, and I used to commiserate about being the last two single, aimless losers in town, but then Grant Chandler––yes, the huge movie star––sped into our tiny town, nearly ran her over, and fell madly in love with her. True story! I couldn’t make this stuff up.
The lights of my life are my nieces and nephew. I might seem like a deadbeat to every adult that spends more than ten minutes with me, but those kids think I’m super-cool Aunt Avery.
It’s my mission in life to take them on great adventures every chance I get. I especially like to get them hopped up on sugar just before taking them home to Alex and Claire. That’s part of the beauty of being an aunt, isn’t it?
Today’s grand plan involved the first ice skate of the season. Alex and I had loved skating at this tiny pond on the outskirts of town when we were little, so I wanted it to be a special place to his kids, too.
Molly, her movie star fiancé, and their son, Scout, were coming to join us. It was sure to be a grand time.
When I went to pick up the kids, Alex’s black lab, Pepper, gave me the most pathetic puppy-dog eyes I’ve ever seen––even though she’s well beyond her puppy years. I smiled down at the persuasive animal. How could I resist her when she was so heartbroken to see her kids leave?
“Oh, okay. Go get your leash.” I could swear that dog was smiling as she ran to where her leash hung. Her tail flapped loudly on the ground as she waited for me to pull it from the hook.
As I passed by the kitchen, I said to my brother, “I’m taking the dog, too.”
Rather than responding to me, he leaned close to his wife and waggled his brows. “Mm… We get the house all to ourselves.”
“We can be adventurous,” she purred suggestively before tipping up on her toes to kiss him.
I gave an exaggerated shiver of disgust and said, “Eww. Wait ’til we’re gone.”
It’s really not fair that I have to be surrounded by nauseating lovebirds when I’m all alone. I must have some shitty karma to compensate for, but I sure don’t remember what I did to deserve this.
My oldest niece, Hannah, was a huge help in getting the wiggly little ones strapped into their car seats. With three kids and a dog along for the ride, I needed a soccer mom’s minivan, instead of my little car.
Somehow, we made it work. As soon as I parked near the pond, we all spilled out, like clowns emerging from a tiny vehicle.
Hannah and I put on our ice skates, but I told the little ones it was best to play and learn to glide with their shoes first. The pond’s ice wasn’t as smooth or cleared off as a rink’s would be, so I thought that might make it easier for them than trying actual skates.
We weren’t there long before Molly and her crew showed up. I felt a bit guilty when I saw Grant’s wheelchair stop as Molly and Scout continued toward us. This location wasn’t ideal for his chair, but I had already told the kids what we were doing when Molly called. I didn’t want to risk my ‘awesome Aunt Avery’ status by changing plans on them at the last minute.
We had a blast sliding, twirling, and throwing snow. We all had red faces, except for Pepper. Hers was almost