can’t be the kind of woman who’s happy sitting at home waiting for her man to come back from deployment. I need to work. I love what I do. I thought you understood that?”
“I do,” he said immediately, stepping toward her.
Gillian wasn’t ready to be placated, so she backed up so he couldn’t touch her. They both knew that was her weakness. That when he put his hands on her, she melted like a piece of chocolate on a hot day.
Walker straightened and his lips pressed together before he spoke again. “Fine. We haven’t talked about this, so now’s as good a time as any. When I realized you were missing, it was the worst day of my life. Worse than any mission I’d been on. My world stopped. I didn’t know what to do or where to even start looking for you. Even worse was the fact that you’d already been missing for a couple hours. I know better than anyone how easy it is to kill someone. You might’ve already been dead before I knew you were missing. I wasn’t there for you when I’d promised you’d be safe, and it almost destroyed me.”
Gillian’s defenses began to crumble at the evidence of his heartbreak. “Walker,” she whispered.
He shook his head and spoke before she could continue.
“We’d done everything we could and it wasn’t enough. The Feds had no idea where you might be, the surveillance cameras hadn’t caught anything. Your phone, purse, and car were still there in the parking garage. We literally had no clues. Nothing. You could’ve been in Mexico already for all we knew. Then, by some miracle, we got the call that you’d been found alive. My heart started beating again at that moment, and I swore that I’d never let you down again.”
“You didn’t let me down,” Gillian insisted. “There was nothing you could’ve done. Walker, I could get hurt or die walking down the street outside your apartment. Or driving to the grocery store. Or I could have a heart attack.”
“Can you please stop talking about you dying?” he begged. “I can’t take it. Not with you standing there with the bruises still on your face and you not letting me touch you.”
“Okay, Walker.”
“I’m not sure you realize how much of a miracle it is that you’re standing in front of me right now. Every day, hundreds of people go missing, never to be seen again. And from everything Agent Tucker has found out, and what me and the team suspect as well, you were taken by the Sinaloa. The most ruthless and dangerous drug cartel the world has ever known. They hijacked a plane, for God’s sake, in order to get back at a rival drug gang.
“Not only were you left alive, but they didn’t sexually abuse you, they didn’t break any bones, they didn’t send body parts to me in the mail, threatening to do more if I didn’t do what they wanted. You should not be standing in front of me right now. It makes no sense. None.
“I know I’ve been overbearing and an ass for the last week, but it’s because I love you so damn much, and the thought of someone deciding they made a mistake and you shouldn’t have been set free, and recapturing you, makes me absolutely crazy. I can’t go through that again. I can’t! It’s unfair for you, and it makes me look like a domineering boyfriend when I can’t leave your side for two minutes without making sure someone is watching over you, but I literally can’t do anything else.
“I’ll get better, I promise. But all I want is for you to be safe. I want to marry you. Have a family. Grow old with you. I know you’re independent. I love that you have your own life, that you don’t need me to be happy. If you ever decided you didn’t love me anymore and you left me, it would suck, but ultimately, I’d be okay…because I’d know you were alive and well. But if you were killed, I wouldn’t be able to survive.
“You were meant to be mine, Gillian. I need you like I need air to breathe. You’ve changed my life in such a short time it’s almost unbelievable. I used to live for the Army. For my teammates. But now I live for you. Now that I’ve had a taste of what my life can be with you, I can’t go back. Please tell me you understand.”
Gillian’s eyes