eyes, on one hand, longing to slide onto his lap and have him tell her everything was going to work out beautifully … and on the other hand, thinking maybe she should run to the end of the dock and dive in, hoping for the cold water to slice some sense into her.
“Or what you want us to be? If anything?” His voice was level, but Gabi could feel him forcing the casual tone.
“Yes. No.” She cringed. “This is the problem. I don’t know. And it’s not fair to skulk around here for the next week trying to figure that out. I don’t think I can.”
“Because it’s impossible to think straight when you’re in my presence?” He lifted his eyebrows. “What with all the handy-ish, man-ish vibes and all?”
Gabi smiled, grateful that he was trying so hard to keep this lighter than it really was. But he was dead right. If she didn’t leave right now, she’d make her decision—whichever way she went—for all the wrong reasons.
And for once in her damn life, she wasn’t going to complete the fall-fast-fall-hard cycle with an epic fall-stupid.
“I have to go, Luke. I’m not saying I won’t be back. I just … have to go.”
Chapter 35
The next afternoon, an hour into the trip back home to Briarwood, Gabi glanced in the rearview mirror and saw the same sight she’d been looking at for the entire trip so far—four girls looking out separate windows, all with their arms crossed. It mirrored the way they’d looked on their way to Camp Echo, but this time, the crossed arms were her fault, not Pricilla Pritchard’s. As furious as these four had been to come to Camp Echo in the first place, they were far angrier about leaving.
And somehow it’d be easier to take, if she herself hadn’t been tempted to turn around ten times already. All she wanted right now was to be in Luke’s arms, Luke’s cabin, Luke’s … life, but she’d promised herself a time-out somewhere far away from Echo Lake so she could think clearly, and as much as it was killing her to drive south right now, she knew she was doing the right thing.
Definitely.
Pretty sure.
Definitely.
“I still don’t understand why we need to go back early.” Madison glared at Gabi. “Is Sam even supposed to be up and around yet?”
“She’s on crutches, Madison. She’s fine. I explained it this morning. The dorm is ready, Oliver and Luke still have a million things to do back at camp, and we were in the way. You guys have served a long enough sentence. There’s no reason to keep hanging out there when we could be out of their hair and back at school. We’ll get the jump on the other students, you know? Get there early and have a little down time.”
Despite her manufactured chipper tone, the argument fell just as flat as she knew it would, dammit.
Waverly spoke up. “Did Luke say we were in the way?”
Gabi sighed. “No.”
“Then why are we leaving?” Eve sat up straighter. “Don’t bullshit us, Gabi. Did you and Luke have a fight? Is that why we have to go?”
“No. Luke and I aren’t—no. He has nothing to do with this.”
“Right.” Madison rolled her eyes. “He’s just the best thing that’s happened to us or you in, like, ever. But we definitely shouldn’t stay and be happy about it. Yes, let’s go back to a deserted campus and hang out being mortally bored for the summer while we wait for the rest of the princesses to show up.”
Sam snorted. “Says the princess of the princesses.”
Gabi braced for Madison’s reply, realizing that only an hour away from Camp Echo, the girls were already reverting to their pre-camp relationship. The weight of dismal failure that had been sitting in her stomach since yesterday sank even further.
“Yeah, well, maybe being a princess is overrated,” Madison replied, making Gabi’s eyebrows fly upward.
Sam turned to look at her. “This mean you’re going to actually act like who you are this year, instead of putting on the rich-bitch cloak when you leave your bedroom?”
Again Gabi braced herself, but Madison just smiled. “I will if you will.”
“Right. Like I have one.”
“You have your own. But you’re actually not nearly as angry and standoffish as you wanted us all to think.”
“Don’t let it get out.” Sam rolled her eyes.
Waverly tapped Gabi’s seat. “Just because they’re getting along now doesn’t mean we’re not still royally ticked that you’re bringing us back early. Just so you know.”
“Noted. Thank