People who'd been protecting the innocent from predators.
And if that was the case, she wasn't sure if she could live with herself.
I'm not a predator. I'm a protector.
Choo Co La Tah's eyes were filled with compassion. "I feel your pain, child. But you should have studied Confucius."
She frowned at his words. "How so?"
"Had you taken the time to learn his wisdom instead of war, you would have known that before you start down the road to revenge, dig two graves."
She bristled at that. "You don't understand."
"There you are quite wrong. Shamefully, all of us have wanted revenge on someone at some point for something. I've lived since before man and buffalo roamed this small planet. I have survived the beginning, bloom, and death of countless enemies, civilizations, and people. And the one truth I have learned most during all of these centuries is the old Japanese proverb. If you sit by the river long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by."
That made her temper boil over. He made it sound so simple. But he was wrong, and she knew it. "Even if he's immortal?"
"Especially then. To quote the Tsalagi, you should never allow your yesterday to use up too much of today. The past is gone and tomorrow is at best a maybe. Live for this moment because it may be all you'll ever have."
She curled her lip in disgust. His pithy phrases were easy to spout, but living with her amount of pain was another story. And seeing your parents slaughtered was something no one got over. Ever. "What are you? A fortune cookie writer?"
The Native American Dark-Hunter started forward, but Choo Co La Tah stopped him before he could reach her. There was laughter in his tone as he spoke. "Respect must be earned, Ren. Not demanded. A questioning mind is the most cherished resource man has and the rarest. I admire her tenacity and her misplaced loyalty."
Those words embarrassed her, and somehow they made her feel like she was being childish.
"And I don't." Deep and resonant, Ren's voice rolled like thunder.
Choo Co La Tah placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "All feelings are valid, and I do not discount yours, Abigail. Our true journey will begin in a handful of hours after the sun sets. In the meantime, all of you need to rest and conserve your strength. Sasha and I will guard you while you slumber." He glanced to Sundown. "And I will notify Andy and make sure he, too, is safe."
Sasha arched a brow. "Why is the wolf always the one who's drafted?"
Choo Co La Tah smiled. "The wolf is the one who is most rested."
Sasha scoffed. "What? You want to toss logic into my emotional outburst? Where's the fairness of that?"
If she wasn't so upset, Abigail might have found Sasha amusing, but right now nothing was funny to her. Not when the agony of her past weighed on her and her conscience ripped at her with razor-sharp talons. I'm not what they say.
She wasn't. At least she hoped she wasn't.
But what if?
Sundown cleared his throat to get Choo Co La Tah's attention. "I agree we need to rest. But there is a small matter of scorpions in the basement, and that's the only safe place for me and Ren during daylight. No offense, I don't really want to nap with them crawling all over me."
Choo Co La Tah stepped away from her. "Ah yes, the scorpion infestation. Don't despair. I've taken care of your pest problem. All of them are gone now."
"You sent the snow?" Abigail asked.
He inclined his head. "The plagues that will come are designed to weaken me. The Coyote is forcing me to expend energy to protect mankind from his tools. For now, my strength holds. But I'm old and I must recharge my powers much more often than I did when I was young. If we don't make it to the Valley before I lose strength..."
It wouldn't be pretty for any of them.
And it will be all by my fault.
Jess saw the terrified look in Abigail's eyes before she hid it. That uncharacteristic frailty from her tugged at his heart. She wasn't the kind of woman to let her vulnerability show. The fact that she did ...
She was in absolute agony, and he'd always been a sucker for a woman in pain.
"C'mon," he said to her gently. "I'll take you back downstairs."