a man who she"d thought was worth the effort to fool her guards. On that point, her grandmother was correct. If push had come to shove, she would have had her way and gone out on a date with any guy that had piqued her interest.
Sitting on the edge of her bed, she let her head fall into her hands. She would not marry a man who didn"t love her. Of that, she was sure of. Yes, he might like her body and they were sexually compatible. Last night had proven that beyond a doubt. Even when she was angry with him, he could still reduce her to a quivering mass of need.
But she wanted more from life. She wanted to be happy and know, deep down inside her that the man she was married to worshiped her for who she was inside. Not just for the body everyone else saw. Was that too much to ask for?
No, she thought to herself. It all came down to the fact that she wanted what everyone else in the world had. She wanted a normal marriage. And that couldn"t happen if she was married to Dharr. Love was the basis for a long lasting, satisfying and fulfilling marriage. Not obligation.
With grim determination she stood up and walked out of her bedroom to confront the bevy of women in the next room who were planning her wedding without consulting her in any way. It was as if she were superfluous to the entire process.
Hiding her shaking hands behind her back, she looked across at the ladies who were diligently discussing the wedding plans. “Excuse me,” she said and waited until all eyes were upon her. “I was wondering if it would be too much trouble for me to escape for a little while and walk through the markets. I"ve never been to this beautiful country and, it doesn"t appear that I"m needed here.” She hoped none of the ladies with kind eyes noticed the slight edge of sarcasm behind her words.
The group of ten women simply stared back, astonished that Electra would make such a request. Finally, the woman in the back of the room holding a sketchpad cleared her throat and stood up. “If you desire something, you have only to ask and it will be delivered to you. There is no need to go shopping on your own.”
The woman had a superior air to her that just grated on Electra"s nerves. It didn"t help when the rest of the group nodded their heads in agreement. Obviously, a future queen going out into the marketplace like a commoner was simply not done.
Gritting her teeth in frustration she said, “That"s very nice of everyone but I don"t have anything in particular that I"d like to purchase. I simply want to look around, discover what"s being sold and experience a little of the culture. As the future queen, I"d like to see what the country is like.” She paused for a long moment, praying the title and her use of it wouldn"t damn her in hell. It smacked of hypocrisy.“Is that too much to ask?” she questioned, making the request more of a challenge.
The woman who appeared to be a dressmaker shrank back down into her chair and the rest of the women looked around at each other.
Electra decided that a mor e direct approach was needed in this situation. “Perhaps I should rephrase my comment,” she said and straightened her shoulders. “I"m going to explore the marketplace. If any of you would like to join me, I would be delighted but I understand that each of you is diligently working on the King"s orders. Since I"ve been taken out of the wedding equation, I find myself redundant to the activities and will therefore occupy myself in some other way.”
With that, she turned on her heel and walked out of the suite of rooms, leaving ten stunned faces behind. She would have laughed if she weren"t so terrified. She had to continue with this brave façade, otherwise everything would be ruined. Feigning a confidence she didn"t feel, she walked up to Gerrard who was still assigned to be her guard. “I"m going to visit the marketplace,” she said and turned toward what she hoped was the exit to the palace.
She felt more than heard Gerrard walking behind her and as she approached one hallway, she heard him sayingsomething into a hidden speaker. She"d seen things like that on television in the movies, especially in