am I unarmed—”
“This could be a part of your plan!”
“And you helped me anyway!” Kenji dares to raise his voice. “Why didn’t you just let me die? Why didn’t you shoot me dead? Why did you help me?”
Adam falters. “I don’t know.”
“You do know. You know I’m not here to mess you up. I took a goddamn beating for you—”
“You weren’t protecting any information of mine.”
“Well, shit, man, what the hell do you want me to say? They were going to kill my ass. I had to run. It wasn’t my fault some dude dropped me off at your door—”
“This isn’t just about me, don’t you understand? I’ve worked so hard to find a safe place for my brother and in one morning you ruined years of planning. What the hell am I supposed to do now? I have to run until I can find a way to keep him safe. He’s too young to have to deal with this—”
“We’re all too young to have to deal with this shit.” Kenji is breathing hard. “Don’t fool yourself, bro. No one should have to see what we’ve seen. No one should have to wake up in the morning and find dead bodies in their living room, but shit happens. We deal with it, and we find a way to survive. You’re not the only one with problems.”
Adam sinks into the sofa. 80 pounds of worry weigh down his shoulders. He leans forward with his head in his hands.
Kenji stares at me. I stare back.
He grins and hobbles forward. “You know, you’re pretty sexy for a psycho chick.”
Click.
Kenji is backing up with his hands in the air. Adam is pressing a gun to his forehead. “Show some respect, or I will burn it into your skull.”
“I was kidding—”
“Like hell you were.”
“Damn, Adam, calm the hell down—”
“Where’s the ‘super-safe place’ you can take us?” I’m up, gun still gripped in my hand. I move into position next to Adam. “Or are you making that up?”
Kenji lights up. “No, that’s real. Very real. In fact, I may or may not have mentioned something about you. And the dude who runs the place may or may not be ridiculously interested in meeting you.”
“You think I’m some kind of freak you can show off to your friends?” Locked. Loaded.
Kenji clears his throat. “Not a freak. Just . . . interesting.”
I point my gun at his nose. “I’m so interesting I can kill you with my bare hands.”
A barely perceptible flash of fear flickers in his eyes.
He swallows a few gallons of humility. Tries to smile. “You sure you’re not crazy?”
“No.” I cock my head. “I’m not sure.”
Kenji grins. Looks me up and down. “Well damn. But you make crazy sound so good.”
“I’m about five inches from breaking your face,” Adam warns him, his voice like steel, his body stiff with anger, his eyes narrowed, unflinching. There’s no hint of humor in his expression. “I don’t need another reason.”
“What?” Kenji laughs, undeterred. “I haven’t been this close to a chick in way too long, bro. And crazy or not—”
“I’m not interested.”
Kenji turns to face me. “Well I’m not sure I blame you. I look like hell right now. But I clean up okay.” He attempts a grin. “Give me a couple days. You might change your mind—”
Adam elbows him in the face and doesn’t apologize.
THIRTY-SIX
Kenji is swearing, bleeding, running out of expletives and tripping his way toward the bathroom, holding his nose together.
Adam pulls me into James’ bedroom.
“Tell me something,” he says. He stares up at the ceiling, takes a hard breath. “Tell me anything—”
I try to focus his eyes, grasp his hands, gentle gentle gentle. I wait until he’s looking at me. “Nothing is going to happen to James. We’ll keep him safe. I promise.”
His eyes are full of pain like I’ve never seen them before. He parts his lips. Presses them together. Changes his mind a million times until his words tumble through the air between us. “He doesn’t even know about our dad.” It’s the first time he’s acknowledged the issue. It’s the first time he’s acknowledged that I know anything about it. “I never wanted him to know. I made up stories for him. I wanted him to have a chance to be normal.” His lips are spelling secrets and my ears are spilling ink, staining my skin with his stories. “I don’t want anyone to touch him. I don’t want to screw him up. I can’t—God I can’t let it happen,” he