funeral home, the same room. I swiped at the mascara streaks on my cheeks as Levi handed me a tissue. Why’d I even bother to wear makeup in the first place?
As we took a few steps closer to the front, my heartbeat seemed to slow down. Even though it was a closed casket, I couldn’t stand the thought of her being in there alone. Coco had been in a car accident, and Mr. and Mrs. Morales didn’t want people’s last memory of her to be the Coco whose car had flipped three times before crashing into a tree.
At least, that’s the story they were telling everyone, but I wasn’t so sure. I’d seen Coco in my vision, hadn’t I? She’d been attacked by a vampire, or so I thought. It had all felt so real. Had it all been fake, a delusion made up by my traumatized brain?
I wanted to see her. I wanted to know, but what could I do? Throw open the casket? Everyone would be horrified.
We stepped up, and the line of people parted to reveal the glossy oak box in front of us.
I felt my knees buckle. Levi gripped my arm and helped me stand while words fell from my lips.
“I’m sorry, Coco. I love you.” I laid a hand on the smooth oak box.
I should have called. I should have been there. This is all my fault.
I began to sob, and Levi helped me to a chair where he held me as I cried.
The funeral was beautiful, but I was glad when it was over. I didn’t know how long I could sit in those uncomfortable chairs and listen to people talk about Coco in the past tense. The hymns and flowers were making my head light and my heart ache. It all felt too painfully similar to Dad’s. Thankfully, it was brief, and Mom and I had decided not to stay for the luncheon afterwards, leaving it for Coco’s immediate family. Plus, we were exhausted, and poor Levi’s shirt was ruined from my tears. If he minded, he didn’t show it.
The three of us followed the guests toward the door, then Mom grabbed my arm. “I want to say goodbye to Coco’s mother. I’ll meet you out there.”
I nodded, watching her filter back through the crowd.
Levi and I exited, stepping out into the hot summer air. The heat felt good on my chilled skin, though I knew it bothered Levi. Always stoic about it, he slipped on his sunglasses then put his arm around me while we walked together to a small picnic table under a maple tree to wait.
“That was a nice service,” Levi said, glancing at me like he wasn’t sure what to say.
I nodded while pulling a tissue out of my purse to try to clean up the mess that was my face. I didn’t really know what to say, either.
“I wonder if I had a funeral,” he said quietly.
When I blinked up at him, he shook his head. “Sorry. I’m not trying to make today about me. We should talk about Coco.”
“No, I could use a change in topic for a while. What do you mean you wonder if you had a funeral?”
He leaned back against the bench’s backrest, letting his black suit jacket fall open to reveal a crisp white shirt. I’d seen the other girls from our high school and some of Coco’s cousins checking him out while they thought I wasn’t looking. It wasn’t the time or the place, but the distraction made me feel just the smallest bit better.
“Well, I died, and dead people usually get funerals.” Levi sighed. “My parents don’t know I’m alive. Well… technically… undead. Anyway, I didn’t see them after I woke up in the morgue, since I couldn’t risk going back to them as the monster I’d become. It would’ve been far too dangerous. By the time I was back in control of myself, it was long past the time they would have held a funeral. It doesn’t matter, but sometimes I wonder if they had one and what it was like.” He went quiet, staring pensively up at the tree branches that swayed gently in the breeze.
“Oh, Levi, I’m so sorry.” I leaned into him and put my hand on his chest where his heart beat no longer. “You haven’t seen them since?”
He shook his head. “They’re still alive. I check in on them from time to time on the web. They’re in their late sixties now. They seem okay.