Geoxus’s champion hadn’t shown—and his attendant had taken the ring.” Madoc glanced up at her, unspeakable sadness in his eyes. “Elias blamed you for Cassia. Why?”
Ash tossed the sponge to the floor and dropped to sit at the end of the pallet. She gave Madoc a brief summation of what she had overheard in the arena’s tunnel after she’d left him at the temple, Petros admitting to Geoxus that he had killed Stavos. She told Madoc how she had looked for him, how Elias had looked for him too. And how they had decided to free Cassia—and that when Elias had been unable to find Madoc, they had all feared Petros had taken him.
“I was with Geoxus,” Madoc said quietly. He winced, rubbing the skin between his brows. When he spoke again, his voice was thin with tears. “I was trying to get him to free her.”
Ash twisted one leg between them on the silk blanket. Tears pricked her eyes as she grabbed his wrist. “I’m sorry. We shouldn’t have gone into Petros’s villa at all.”
Her words tumbled into themselves.
“Seneca was there,” she forced herself to say. The final missing piece. The mysterious she Stavos had mentioned. “She can control anathreia too. She took Cassia’s divinity.”
Madoc whipped a horrified look to her, bloodshot veins running through his eyes. “Seneca is Soul Divine?” He paused, gaping. “That’s how she knew so much about it.”
Or she’s something far worse. But Ash couldn’t say more without disintegrating.
A brittle sob racked her. “Everything’s so wrong,” she managed. “It’s too much. You shouldn’t have come back. You were right—you should’ve just run while you had the chance.”
“But then you’d be dead,” Madoc whispered.
Ash thanked the blur of tears in her eyes that she couldn’t see the look on his face. She didn’t think she’d be able to handle it.
“You should know,” Ash started, “that Cassia saved my life. She was so strong, and she fought so well. She died protecting me.”
Madoc gave a weak chuckle. “That sounds like her. She was our protector—kept us in line, at least. She always did what was right. If Petros had wanted Elias or me, she’d never have let us get taken in the first place.” He scrubbed the heel of his palm into his eye.
Ash’s heart cracked. “I’m so sorry.”
She was still touching his other wrist; she could feel his pulse beating under her fingertips. And when he twisted his hand to grab her arm, gripping her imploringly, Ash couldn’t breathe.
Madoc kept his head bent. “It wasn’t your fault.”
Ash jolted, relief trying to push its way through the heaviness of sorrow and the intensity of sitting here next to him. But she had carried guilt for so long in other forms—she didn’t know how to peel it off, even with his absolution.
She started to stand. “Thank you for saving me. We should—”
Madoc’s fingers tightened around her arm. They were callused on the tender skin of her wrists, and that touch kept her seated. “You didn’t fight back. Against Elias.”
“Of course not.”
“He would have killed you.” His eyes lifted to hers, intent, heavy. “I thought he had.”
Ash felt timid under his gaze, though she was covered in dried blood and sweat and sand. “I’m an enemy gladiator. Losing me shouldn’t matter to you.”
“If it didn’t matter to me”—Madoc’s voice was husky—“I wouldn’t have stood in that entrance hall, watching Elias hurt you, thinking, Not her, too.”
Ash’s body vibrated so fast it hummed. It seemed impossible that he was saying this to her, that he cared, after everything that had happened.
But he wanted her.
He had seen all her truths and scars and failures, and had still rushed back to save her life.
Ash’s lips parted, her eyes darting over his, searching for some sign that this was all a ruse. But his sincerity was as pure as it had always been.
After a lifetime of fighting to keep herself out of the yawning chasm that was loneliness, Ash let it rise up over her. She didn’t have to fear it.
A dam broke in her chest. Madoc’s hand was around hers, but suddenly that small touch of his fingers on her skin wasn’t enough. She wanted his arms around her. She wanted to feel his body’s warmth against her own heat. She wanted to comfort him and let him comfort her and feel something good in all this bad.
“Madoc.” His name tumbled out of her mouth, a plea, a promise.
His eyes fell to her lips. Light spun through Ash’s mind.
But footsteps stampeded up