woman fall for me, the way I’ve fallen for her.
Don’t mess it up.
4
Quinn
My apartment seems so much smaller with this giant man inside of it.
As predicted, my cat reacts like she’s been electrocuted at the sight of a stranger and vanishes. I trip over my area rug because Desmond is so distracting, picking up my little knickknacks with his big paws, turning them over as if he’s trying to learn about me through my possessions.
Stop that fanciful thinking.
He’s doesn’t have feelings for me.
No. Not only did we meet just this morning, but I’ve sort of coerced him into teaching me how to be sexy and confident. He’s a beautiful firefighter with an outgoing personality—surely he wants nothing serious with awkward, introverted me. So why has he agreed to help me? Well I don’t know a lot about men, but I’m quite certain they don’t turn down no-strings flings with a woman. That’s all tonight will be for Desmond.
For me?
A whole other story.
I’m drawn to this man, even more than I’m enticed by a well-seasoned French cassoulet. He’s kind and funny and listens to me when I speak. His hearty laugh matches the rest of him. Even his heart, I’m sensing. I can still feel his hand on the base of my spine as he led me across the street and the memory of his protectiveness makes me want to…to…bite his thick thighs. Yes, bite them. Sensually.
I hardly know myself anymore—and I kind of like that.
I like how brave and unconcerned with keeping up appearances I am around him. There is no worry about having the proper response or filling holes with small talk about the weather. He makes me feel comfortable in my own skin.
Even so, I cannot believe I basically asked him to be my sex tutor. I can’t believe I am actually going to go through with it—and more than that, I’m excited. A night in Queens! It might as well be Madagascar for all the time I’ve spent there. But I’m eager to see Desmond’s house. If I only have one night to revel in him, I’m going to make the most out of it.
I realize I’ve been quietly staring at him like a nutcase for a solid two minutes.
“Would you like anything to drink?” I blurt.
“No, thanks. I’m good.” He points at a picture on the mantle. The one of me holding a framed copy of my first restaurant review in the New York Times, an older woman standing behind me. “This your mother?”
“Yes.” At the mention of my mother, I automatically try to smooth the wrinkles from my dress. “If she knew how forward I’ve been with you, she would be scheduling extra therapy sessions through next year.”
He grins. “She’s a little strait-laced?”
“That’s an understatement.” I twist the diamond stud in my ear. “I think she means well. She wants what’s best for me, but sometimes I wish she’d let me decide what that is. I’ve spent so long trying to please her, I don’t know how to…”
“Please yourself?”
“Yes.”
Desmond touches his tongue to the corner of his mouth. “I can help with that.”
“I hope so,” I whisper, his smoky tone making my toes curl in my sensible heels. “I’m going to pack. I won’t be a moment.”
“I’ll help.”
My steps falter on the way to my bedroom, tingles crawling up my spine at the sound of his heavy footsteps behind me. I wasn’t lying when I said I’d never had a man in my apartment and wow, what a man to select for the first time. He’s such a presence. So male.
When he asked me if I want to become more confident so I can ask out other men, I fudged my answer a little. Sure, I suppose someday in the future, tonight’s lesson will come in handy, but I can barely remember other men exist when Desmond is close. I wonder how long it will take me to move on once the tutorial is complete and he’s gotten his fill.
A pang in my chest catches me off guard and I massage it on the way into my bedroom. Pushing open the door, I look at my space through Desmond’s eyes. Light, tasteful, lots of white and yellow and orange. Books and food magazines scattered everywhere. This is the only area of my life that I control completely and letting him see it is as intimate as a kiss.
Not that I would know that for sure.
But by tonight, I will.
Trying to hide the hot shiver passing