There’s no reason to upset everything right now. Not to mention, I’m not going to get you fired from this job. You’re the one that said it’s your last shot.”
“I’ll find another job.”
“Not like this one, you won’t. And we both know it.”
She let out a little groan. “Now I almost wish you hadn’t told me. Like, as your friend I’m so glad you felt like you could confide in me, but as a person in a professional relationship with Noah, I feel like an accomplice or something.”
“You’re not an accomplice. There’s no crime being committed here. I will tell him. After the work is done. I’ll deal with the fallout then.”
“Do you know how unreliable construction is? I’m hoping to be done in three months and that’s only if nothing goes wrong, and things always go wrong. Isn’t it better to tell him now than six months from now? And weren’t you just telling me how I shouldn’t be avoiding things? Neither should you!”
I blurted out, “I can’t lose him.” It was probably one of the most honest things I’d ever said, and it surprised me how deeply I felt those words. I’d constructed all these walls, some intentional, some not, and he hadn’t just broken them down. He’d flattened them with a steamroller and taken up residence in my heart. I really cared about him. He was the first man I’d ever felt this way about, and I just . . . I couldn’t lose him. I accepted that there was an ending coming for us. But not yet. I wasn’t ready to let go. “He’s this incredible person and so unlike what I imagined. I mean, he’s definitely all alpha and he would beat the crap out of somebody who tried to hurt me, but then he’d take me home and make me dinner and read me a sonnet he’d composed. He’s so strong and masculine, but he plays with my hair and makes me laugh and is so smart and worldly and adores his dog and I just . . . I need him.”
Something in my response saddened Shelby, and she said sympathetically, “Oh, sweetie.”
I brushed away the few tears that had managed to escape. “I’ll tell him. I will. After you’ve finished. When the time is right. Okay?”
“Okay. All I want is for you to be happy. You know how much I love you.” She hugged me tightly, and I ignored the burning lump in my throat that urged me to cry.
“I know. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” And I had to hope that it would be true.
I woke up the next morning to the sound of loud banging at the front door. Sunshine was whining outside my bedroom, apparently unhappy at there being a guest. I got up, grumbling the whole way.
When I opened the door, I was surprised to see Noah standing there. He was rocking on his heels, looking far too gleeful for this early in the morning. Okay, technically it was almost noon, but I hadn’t slept well.
He grinned. “What are you doing today? We should hang out. My new dog sitter, Joe, is at my house, and he’s agreed to keep an eye on Sunshine, too.”
“Um, okay.” My brain wasn’t working yet and he was all dazzling and bright and I was sure that I looked like a coffin had just thrown me up. “What did you have in mind?”
“I was hoping maybe you could teach me how to drive.”
I blinked slowly. “You don’t know how to drive?”
“My parents didn’t want me to drive, so I never got a license as a teenager. It wasn’t my job to drive in the army and then I was living in New York and didn’t need it there. But I read this script that I’m excited about. I’d be a getaway driver and they would have someone show me how to do stunt driving, but I figured I should probably learn the basics first.” He seemed to think I was reluctant. I was going to do it—I was just still sleepy. “Come on, I teach you something, you teach me something.”
“Kissing and driving are not the same thing. Plus, so far you haven’t really taught me anything.”
“Not yet.” His voice was low and appealing and cut through my tiredness better than a jolt of caffeine.
“Let me get me and Sunshine ready and I’ll come up to your house.”
“Okay. See you soon!”
As I closed the door, I realized that I hadn’t even