you understand why I ran. Why I will continue to run. Please, love, hear me out.”
Wren sucked her lip in and turned toward her friends. The question went unspoken—did she give him a chance to explain? The other two agreed, to his relief. She turned back to him.
“I want the truth and all of it, or I’m calling it right here, right now.”
He sat on the ground, making it softer than normal.
“I was born around five hundred cold moons ago.” He paused as the girls reacted to that. He wondered how old they were compared to him. They looked a bit younger than him but knew that didn’t mean much when it came to time. After Wren closed her open mouth, Lilah returned to a sitting position from falling back, and Daphne took another breath, he continued.
“My parents were the alpha—leading—couple of the village. Back then, the village was much larger than it is now.”
Wren said, “Haml had mentioned that.” Jealousy ripped through him thinking about the male being so close to Wren. He tried not to show it, but his animal made that hard. “What happened?” she asked.
“The dark magic of the world was strong then. Very different from now.” Though with the few changes he’d seen lately, the balance could be changing. “We fought an evil species who lived to hurt others. The battle was intense. The fae were losing. So many died.” His heart squeezed at the memory. He didn’t want to recall what he’d spent hundreds of years suppressing.
But for his mate, he’d do almost anything. He hit his chest with the heel of his hand and cleared his throat. “Somehow, a group of fae, including my parents, were cut off from the rest of us. They were surrounded and taken down.” He hadn’t seen their deaths. Didn’t need to, to know they were gone. During the battle, an anguish took him to his knees tore through him. Then he knew.
“It became my decision how to proceed. I’d been three hundred cold moons, barely an adult, when the conflict began. Too naïve to the way of things and consequences. In my anger and grief, I made the rash decision to continue the fight. I wanted revenge.”
The image in his head of the aftermath of his choice stole his breath. So much blood, so much death. Brown, red, and blue mixed into one burial ground. Wren scooted behind him and wrapped her arms around him, laying her head on his back. He leaned into her, needing to feel as much of her as he could.
“So many died. All generations lost loved ones. Our village dwindled to so few. All because I made the decision to go on.”
Wren lifted her head, leaving a cold spot on his back from the absence of her warmth. “But you won, Zee,” she said.
“Did I? Did we?” No, he couldn’t categorize so many deaths as a win.
“Is that why you were in the jungle?” Daphne asked.
He nodded. “I was too ashamed, too devastated, at what I’d done. I didn’t deserve to be the next leader of the Gnoleon. I wasn’t worthy, so I ran. I shifted into my tigron and vowed to never return to my fae form or the village. That was my punishment for my failure as a leader.”
“But, Zee,” Wren said, stronger, “you won. What would your world be like if you stopped fighting, and saved those lives, and they were enslaved or tortured? Would that have been preferable?”
“Of course not,” he replied. But still. . .
Lilah cocked her head. “What has all that to do with why it’s dangerous for us to know you?”
Was she serious? Did she not understand? “Because everyone in the village wants to see me dead.”
“Why?” Lilah continued.
He glanced at his mate, hoping she’d explain what he was missing in her friend’s logic. “Because I made the decision that killed hundreds of lives.”
Lilah snorted. “I think you underestimate your people, buddy. Maybe you weren’t meant to lead.”
Beside him, Wren stiffened. Her face held a frown toward her friend, who was correct in her final conclusion. His mate looked around. “Is there a way we can have a moment alone? Go outside.”
“No. We’re not going outside. I will raise a divider between us.”
“What?” Daphne sputtered. “You’re going to separate us?”
Wren sighed. “Just for a little bit, Daph. Unless you want to hear all the mushy stuff.”
Lilah and Daph glanced at each other. “We do,” they said together.
Wren huffed as he laughed and raised a wall