those professions were necessary. Assumptions on her part may have been pointless. It would depend on what happened when Kai answered his door.
The hallway was empty when she left the elevator. The overhead light near the end of the corridor by her former apartment was flickering, threatening to go out, and it drew Gia’s attention as she stood in front of Kai’s door, taking in deep breaths as she readied herself to knock. It had been days since she saw him last. Days since she made the forty-five-minute trip to the Northshore with Kona to say her farewell. She’d wanted to go to Kai that night, make her confessions and her apologies the second she’d spoken her goodbye to Luka. But it had seemed disrespectful somehow to her first love’s memory. At least, that’s what she’d convinced herself of. Cat had called her a coward.
“You’re petrified he’ll put you out the second you tell him you want him,” her friend had said, not bothering to hide her grin as she leaned against the freshly wiped wooden bar top next to Gia at Lucy’s.
“I’m not. I’m just…”
“Chicken shit.”
Gia hadn’t bothered arguing with buzzed-Cat logic. Not when Wilson appeared, and that buzzed logic threatened to become couple-logic. Gia hadn’t believed she could handle that.
If she was honest, Cat was more right than Gia would ever let on. Part of her M.O. was to conceal and deflect. It was how she’d survived so long without any real damage to her ego or her heart. Now, though, standing in front of Kai’s door, her hand curled into a ball ready to knock, all those protective safeguards went out the window. He could say no. He could tell her to fuck off.
But she had to risk her heart and her pride.
She’d promised herself and Luka she’d begin testing those new wings.
Gia inhaled, lifting her hand to the door and tightened her eyes shut, knocked twice before she lost her nerve. She hated the anxious rumble in the pit of her stomach and the slip of her usual control that seemed to only vanish when she was around Kai.
It was several long moments, perhaps four hundred and eleven billion hours by her hyper estimation before Gia heard any movement on the other side of the door, but eventually, the knob turned, the hinges squeaked, and then Kai stood before her.
He stared down at her with his eyebrows arched up, nearly concealed by his mussed hair that lay in several different directions across his forehead. She squinted at it then sought his eyes, hoping to get a read on his mood in a quick glance. But Kai rubbed his face, as though he was coming out of a hard nap and ran a hand through his unkempt hair before nodding at her. It was more of a greeting than Gia had expected, one that she jumped on.
“Hi,” she started, unable to stare directly at him for too long. When he didn’t speak, but instead moved his chin again, offering another silent greeting, she continued. “Um…hey. Is…Keola in?” She glanced over his shoulder, then felt a wave of courage zip through her and barged into his apartment, finding no resistance from him.
“Oh, that’s right,” she continued, turning to face him when she came to the center of the living room. “She texted me last night. She…has that sleep over with the girls from the Lil’ Steamers today.” She moved farther into the room, spotting the empty beer bottles on the coffee table, the bowl of blue nachos and a movie Gia recognized from the eighties muted on the T.V., “Lady Hawk” if she wasn’t mistaken.
She turned, glancing at Kai, taking in his rumpled Steamers tee and comfortable-looking jeans. Gia guessed she was interrupting his down time and decided to hurry through this confession before the small frown on his face deepened or she lost her nerve.
“Listen, I just…wanted to say something to you and then I’ll…” Gia glanced at his face, her courage dwindling when he squinted. She caught a few moments of the movie, watching a young, pixie-cut sporting Michelle Pfeiffer running into the arms of her dark knight. Gia hated how stupid she felt, how tense and ridiculous. She’d blundered everything between them so much she didn’t know how to begin. This wasn’t her—this nervous, anxious idiot she was being.
When she looked back at Kai and his expression went from confusion to mild irritation, Gia held up a finger, figuring he was likely already still irritated