a strong woman making a place for yourself in the world and facing challenges you will overcome.”
“Right, and I let an overbearing jerk scare me today.”
“So go back and face him.”
“You think that’s wise?”
“My opinion doesn’t matter. Look, I don’t know the guy. If you think he’s going to attack you or hurt you or something like that, then stay far, far away. But if this was just a freak-out panic attack, then you should go face your fear.”
Jessica watched the waves for a long time. “Maybe it was bad memories of that time in the locker room. I don’t like him much. He was the quarterback of the football team who spread all that gossip about me. And he was friends with the running back who cornered me in the locker room that time and then turned around a few months later and called me a slut in front of half the student body.”
“Okay, there is that. So here’s the choice. Walk away if he truly makes you feel unsafe. Or you could just make him pay a whole lot for this house he wants.”
“He’s paying me double my regular rate.”
“Oh, honey, you should have asked for more than that.”
“You’re suggesting revenge?”
“Well, maybe. I prefer to call it justice. You could build him a lemon or something.”
“I wouldn’t do that.”
“Of course you wouldn’t. You’re the nicest person I know.”
Jessica leaned back and let go of a long breath. “I’m really not that nice. On the inside.”
“Yes, you are.”
“Oh, well, it probably doesn’t matter. He hated my design.”
“Look, sweetie, I know what you’re thinking. I know the voice that comes at you when you’re most vulnerable, telling you that you’re no damn good, will never be any good, and are destined to fail. But you know that voice is wrong, right?”
“Yeah.” She said the word, and she knew Hillary was right, but it didn’t change the way she felt.
When she ended her call with Hillary, Jessica decided not to go back to work. She didn’t have any projects now that the Martin residence had blown up in her face, and she certainly wasn’t in the right frame of mind to think about marketing.
What she needed was a hard run or a long swim, or she could just put on her overalls and start painting the upstairs hallway.
She’d finally decided on a color called “butterfly yellow,” which was rich and sunny and reminded her of MeeMaw. She hoped MeeMaw wouldn’t mind this new coat of paint. As it was, there were some things Jessica had trouble touching or changing about the house. Like the collection of Limoges figurines on the bureau in the master bedroom.
Those little porcelain figures of French aristocrats in their wigs, knee britches, and big, elaborate dresses were about as far away from Jessica’s design preferences as knickknacks could get. And yet they had been MeeMaw’s treasures, so they stayed on the bureau.
The hallway was merely a passage from one room to another, so it didn’t hold a ton of memories. A few weeks ago, Jessica had started patching and sanding the walls, and they were ready for paint.
She got to work, rolling the sunny new color onto the walls, the Zen of the work emptying her brain for a few hours. By the time she’d finished, cleaned her brushes, and showered the paint splatter off her skin and out of her hair, she was in the right frame of mind to listen to the voice message Topher had left hours ago.
She didn’t know what to expect when she pushed the playback button. Jerks were good at apologizing. But listening to his voice didn’t send shivers of dread up her spine. Maybe she had overreacted.
She needed this job. But she’d have to set limits. She would not tolerate his rudeness or his anger, even if he was going through a bad time in his life.
And she’d need to fully understand where she’d gone off the tracks with the design. Because even though the concepts hadn’t been fully fleshed out, she’d been pretty certain that she’d captured what he wanted.
She sucked in a big breath and called him back. Of course she got his voice mail, which was supremely frustrating considering how much courage it had taken to dial his number.
She left a message and then got up from the kitchen table and paced around the room, her mind as flighty as a caged bird.
Maybe this was one of those times when she should just take the bull by