cold, heartless manner he treated me with, I was loyal. I was obedient. I never trusted anyone, and never went against him no matter how insignificant the occasion.
I was a shell of my former self.
I was a frightened coward until the day I discovered I was pregnant.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
The Present
Alessandro's soft whispers and apologies echoed in my mind the entire night. When I woke up in the morning, he lay next to me—pale and frozen as a statue. There were dark blue bags underneath his eyes, and he refused to meet my gaze. His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat, as though he fought to breathe. Something seemed to eat at him from the inside. Could my scars have affected him to this extent? I shouldn’t have cared, but his alarming behavior disturbed me to the point I itched to break the tension-filled silence. “Alessandro,” I muttered in a quiet voice, but there was no response.
He stared at the ceiling, lost in deep thought. A heavy breath filled with pressure flared through his nostrils. Then, he turned toward me and I was captivated by the glistening traces of light in his dark gaze. Slowly, his hand neared my face and caressed my skin. His knuckles froze against my cheek and we gazed at each other for several silent heartbeats.
“You were so innocent,” Alessandro murmured. “And I was such a bastard.”
“What makes you say that?” I asked in confusion.
His lips twisted into a shadow of a smile. “It's just a feeling I have. I'm sorry that I hurt you, piccola.”
Somehow, it seemed he apologized for more than the scars on my back, but that was impossible. He didn't remember. I didn't know what to say to him. One apology couldn’t erase years of suffering and pain. Nevertheless, I didn’t want to be cruel and pretend he never said it. “I appreciate it,” I whispered. “It means a lot after all these years.”
Something flashed in his eyes. “It means nothing, Olivia. Not a damn thing. We both know that.”
Alessandro was in a dangerous, unpredictable mood. I had no idea what was happening in his head, but his eyes roamed my face with palpable nervousness, as if my presence disturbed him. Then, his torn expression deepened and he swallowed hard. “If you could make one wish and have it come true, what would it be?” he asked in a distant voice.
Freedom... “I don't know. I've never given it much thought.”
“You wouldn't want to belong to a different man?” he asked. “To someone who can make you smile?”
Suddenly, I remembered his accusations from the previous evening and my eyes clouded with fear. I shook my head, offering him a silent answer. “Can we talk about Broderick?” I probed with caution. I still wasn't sure Alessandro wouldn't hurt him.
“If we must,” he said calmly.
“Alessandro, I swear that he never—”
“If you’re about to plead for his life, save your breath,” Alessandro reassured. “I do not intend to have him killed.”
“Are you going to fire him?”
“I do not need to fire him. He offered his resignation yesterday,” Alessandro revealed in a matter-of-fact tone.
I paled, half-ready to argue with him, when he shocked me into silence.
“I declined,” he said, brushing his thumb along my parted lips.
“You...you declined?” I asked in surprise.
“I declined,” Alessandro confirmed, then furrowed his brows. “That doesn't mean I like him, cara.”
“What does it mean, then?”
His black eyes bored straight into mine. “It means I trust you not to do the wrong thing.”
“You didn't seem very trusting that day in the library,” I reminded him.
“What do you want me to say? I don't like seeing you around other men. That is never going to change,” he stated with a shrug. “But I can't keep you locked up in a cage.”
Yes you can...I thought, but swallowed my answer.
“If you say he’s nothing more than a friend, I have no other choice but to accept that. Just don't expect me to be graceful about it.”
“So, you don't mind us spending time together?” I asked in wonder.
“I mind, cara. I mind very much.” He caressed my cheek. “But I will pretend that I don't…for your sake.”
“Why?” I breathed.
He smiled shortly. “I don't know. I was hoping it might earn me some points.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “Alessandro...”
“I realize that I'm very much in the red. Especially after what I've seen last night,” he whispered. “I don't want to add to the debt I might never be able to repay.”