the more meticulously one looks. Do you still remember Picnic Point, when we became engaged? I sang for joy early the next morning at the club. And before that: our first serious conversation at the restaurant on State Street? That conversation became my guiding star, and has remained so. In the sixteen years that followed, how often we lay our heads on each other’s shoulders at night when life had made us weary, either yours on mine or mine on yours, and then everything was fine again. I have done this in my thoughts over the past several weeks and will do the same in those to come. I have also thought regularly of you and all my loved ones at eight o’clock each morning and nine o’clock each night. They all think of both of us at the very same time. Do it as well; then we shall know that our feelings of love are flowing between all of us.
The strain of our work meant that our lives were not easy, and there was no small risk of being overwhelmed, but even so, we remained very much alive as people. This became clear to me during our time on the Grossglockner, and again this year, as we watched the great elk emerge in front of us as we walked through the forest by the sea.
You are in my heart, and you shall always be within it! My dearest wish is for you to be happy when you think of me. I am when I think of you.
Many, many kisses! I am holding you close.
Your A.
For five days, the defendants were subjected to Roeder’s belligerent and bombastic questioning. Mildred tried not to flinch as he harangued her, and she struggled to remain calm when he repeatedly interrupted her. When Dr. Schwarz argued that she was innocent of wrongdoing because like any good German wife she had simply obeyed her husband’s instructions, Roeder barked out a derisive laugh. To Mildred’s astonishment, several of the judges reacted with frowns or reproving looks, which they concealed so quickly that she was afraid she had imagined them. But for the first time since she had entered the courtroom, she felt a flicker of hope, even though she was deeply afraid of what Dr. Schwarz’s legal strategy might mean for Arvid.
As the trial unfolded, she endured questioning with as much serene composure as she could muster, and she silently cheered on her companions when they remained dignified, eloquent, and calm in the face of Roeder’s verbal assaults. Only once did she feel truly hopeless, when Libertas broke down on the stand and began shouting that she was innocent, that Harro was to blame for everything, that she wanted a divorce. Harro endured it unflinchingly, but Mildred was sure his wife’s desperate rebuke had wounded him.
After several grueling days the prosecution rested its case, and on December 19, the verdicts were delivered. For the crimes of preparation for high treason, war treason, undermining military strength, aiding the enemy, and espionage, the court sentenced Arvid, Harro, Libertas, Kurt Schumacher, Elizabeth Schumacher, Hans Coppi, Kurt Schulze, John Graudenz, and Horst Heilmann to death. Herbert Gollnow received the death penalty for disobedience in the field and for disclosing state secrets to the enemy. Erika von Brockdorff was sentenced to ten years at hard labor for keeping a radio that was used to contact the Soviets.
Lastly, the judges declared that they concurred with Dr. Schwarz that Mildred had acted more from loyalty to her husband than from her own political motives. Despite her exceptional understanding of German literature, as a foreigner, she could not possibly comprehend the implications of disloyalty to the Reich. Therefore, she was sentenced not as a conspirator, but as an accessory to espionage, for which she received six years hard labor.
When Mildred’s sentence was read aloud, Arvid smiled at her, his face radiant with joy. He would die, but she would live.
“This is an outrage,” Roeder exploded, bolting to his feet. “I demand twelve death sentences! The Führer ordered me to cauterize this sore. He will never approve this decision!”
The judges made no reply, but rose and withdrew to their chambers. Quickly the twelve defendants embraced one another before the guards could pull them apart. Mildred clung to Arvid, resting her head on his chest and choking out sobs, but although Arvid’s eyes shone with unshed tears, he could not stop smiling. She knew that he had never dared hope that his own life would be