if anyone’s ever going to be safe around me, but it kills me, especially, that in trying to protect you, I hurt you worse.”
“We don’t know that.” I reminded him. “The doctors…”
“Are consulting. Yes, I heard you.”
“They’re consulting adults.” I snort-giggled. “Shh…They’re going over my x-rays to see if I have loose screws…” I laughed until tears stung my eyes. “Where’s Tag and Molly? I have to tell them all about that.”
“Taggart took Morrigan back to my place. Molly went to get something to eat.”
“Wait, don’t you need Morrigan? Oh. You stayed with me. Is Molly getting me something too? Why do I feel…itchy?”
“That’ll be the painkillers.”
That sucked. “What good is being…pain free if you’re gonna itch.”
“It’s a tradeoff.”
I looked around. “Where?”
“What?” he asked.
“The tradeoff. Where?”
He kissed my forehead. “Exactly. Why don’t you go back to sleep? I’ll be here.”
I sighed with relief and closed my eyes. “Thank you.”
“You’re very welcome.”
His lips pressed against mine.
Then his freshly shaved cheek rubbed my neck.
I got the strongest, most vivid memory of a scene from my childhood. I don’t know how old I was, only that I’d spent the day wearing a stiff little suit and bow tie, and people kept picking me up and putting me down and telling me not to move.
Mother stood by, laughing with a man holding a camera. Bright lights and shiny silver umbrellas stood like trees with skinny roots above ground.
Then we left and I fell asleep in the car. When I woke up, I was alone, sitting in my car seat in the dark garage and my parents were arguing.
“…completely callous disregard—”
“See?” The overhead light went on. “I told you, he’s absolutely fine. If you wake him now, he’ll only end up crying all night.”
“Unbelievable.” The car door opened, and Dad leaned in to unbuckle me. Large hands scooped me up and held me to a chest covered in a dozen different textures, scratchy, silky, smooth, and rough. The aftershave he wore had faded, and he smelled like smoke and alcohol.
He lifted me until my forehead fell against his neck and the deep rumble of his voice was like an engine, purring through me.
“Hey, Sebby. Bet you’re ready for bedtime, huh? Shall I read you a story?”
“Drummer Hoff,” I muttered against the stubble on his neck.
“You got it.”
People might be tempted to use my best memories to explain my taste in men, but correlation is not causation.
I had no Daddy issues.
I was raised by a wonderful, loving, and kind father.
Naturally, I wanted a partner like Stone, who reminded me of all my father’s best qualities but didn’t feel the need to parent me. Someone who cared about me enough to let me make mistakes. Someone who listened to me, who let me nurture him as much as he nurtured me.
I wanted a man who wouldn’t leave a child alone in a car, ever. Not because it might be dangerous but because being alone in a car sucked.
I wanted a man who understood that people need one another, even if they don’t necessarily acknowledge that fact.
I wanted a partner like Stone. I wanted Stone, just Stone.
“Take me home?” I asked.
“As soon as they let me,” he replied.
Chapter Twenty-One
Stone
Artemis’s naming day began with a lazy, sensual shower for two and a walk to feed and greet our canine guests, as Sebastian called them.
One of the volunteer trainers Ariel worked with came by to give each one individual exercise time, freeing me to read while Sebastian napped the morning away with his head pillowed on my lap.
Sebastian’s bruises were fading, but the misery I felt from hurting him hadn’t. I don’t know what I’d have done if I’d reinjured him seriously.
It was time to talk about that and a dozen other things. We had coyly tiptoed around some big decisions. We liked spending time with each other. Things felt right between us.
What would happen if we tried to move forward together in some way?
Where would our home base be? How would we handle the many necessary separations dictated by our jobs? What about the disparity in our incomes? How would we live if he was used to all the finest things, but I liked simplicity and living with nature outside my door?
We couldn’t go on hiding from the world this way forever.
Even pragmatist Molly seemed to take for granted that the little pack we’d formed was permanent in some way. She’d added my schedule to her tablet and ran media intervention for both of us. For Sebastian, that meant