and can take my kids to both of them if I have to—I work at the clinic with Mel Sheridan and at the school with Becca Timm, the teacher, and some other mothers. But the most important thing is how practical and nonjudgmental Reverend Kincaid has been. I was very reluctant to go talk to a preacher after all the horrid things I’d done to get myself into my own mess.”
Even with that glowing endorsement, Katie didn’t feel inclined to seek counseling from the church. She was a little concerned about how the good minister might react to the fact that one of the things she grieved was the best sex of her life.
“I see him with his wife,” Leslie said. “I have a feeling he’d be sympathetic. He looks at her like a starving man looks at a rib roast.”
Katie giggled.
“You look like you could use a little milkshake or something,” Leslie suggested. “Has this whole thing caused you to lose weight?”
“Possibly a pound or two, but don’t worry. I’ll gain it right back.”
“Aren’t you eating?”
“My appetite is a little off, but what do you expect? It’ll come back. Soon, I think, since I’m starting to hate him.”
“Really?” Leslie asked with a bit of excitement.
“Yes, really. What the hell was he thinking, telling me he doesn’t date women with children because he’s never going to be a family man, then not only dating me but shtupping me all the time. Did he really think I was taking him seriously? Wouldn’t any woman think he’d shifted his thinking? What a fool!”
“Fool?” Leslie asked.
“If he’s not going to get involved, maybe he shouldn’t get involved. Hmm?” she asked, lifting a brow.
“Novel concept,” Les agreed with a grin.
“Someone was thinking with his dick,” Katie said, bringing a burst of laughter from both Leslie and Nora. “I was pretty hurt and lonely but I’m getting angry.”
“I think I like where this is going,” Leslie said.
“He ought to be ashamed of himself. At least I was sincere on all fronts. In for a penny, in for a pound. The jerk.”
“You have a lot of your brother in you, Katie,” she said. “Hungry?”
“Actually I am a little hungry. You have any cookies?”
Even a little bit of man-hate didn’t completely restore her appetite. But then, fretting and feeling emotionally gutted didn’t connect up to that good old robust habit.
It was a relief to see how well Conner and Leslie fit into the town; they had clearly found their place. And that helped Katie see this as a good place to raise her sons, even without a husband.
The second week in July passed and the weather was about as steamy as it was going to get in the mountains—a hot eighty degrees. After driving the boys to summer program, she headed for Fortuna. First she went to the grocery store’s news rack and, thank God, Dylan Childress wasn’t groping anyone for the paparazzi today. Then she went to the pharmacy aisle where she grabbed a pregnancy test. She didn’t think it possible, but she just hadn’t felt well and couldn’t imagine it was all grief. She picked one up. Fifteen dollars? she thought in amazement. And who knew how accurate it was. She picked up a second for twenty-one dollars. And a third for seven and a fourth for twelve and a fifth for nineteen. “I’ll send him a bill,” she said aloud, and she walked to the checkout, head held high.
Realistically, Katie thought her period was overdue because of the stress, the sadness and upset of having a love affair go south without warning. She never kept track of her monthlies because she could feel it coming—a low backache, some cramps, tender breasts and bang—there it was. She thought she was at least a couple of weeks late, so a test to be sure she wasn’t pregnant made sense.
An hour later she was peeing on a stick. The directions said it would be more accurate first thing in the morning but it was more likely to give a false negative when it was positive than a false positive if testing was done in the middle of the day.
Ding, ding, ding.
“Nooooooo!” she wailed. “No, no, no, no, no, no, NO!”
But yes. It said yes. And this was completely impossible—there had always been protection, always. Not only was she responsible about it, Dylan was obsessive! He was the guy who didn’t want a family! God forbid he should end up paying the piper for all his screwing around!
She