inner doors in the infirmary. He opened it and I caught a glimpse of some lab equipment as he stepped inside.
“Inara, I must check on a few of my tests. Do not go near the human while you clean,” he said.
He shut the door and Inara backed away, the smile on her face fading.
“I’m not dangerous,” I said. “He was just joking.”
“Sigan doesn’t joke,” she said.
“Jesus, you got that right,” I said. “Look, I promise I’m not dangerous.”
“Why do you have that cuff around your wrist then?”
“They think I’m a thief.”
Her eyes widened. “Why would you steal from them? To be accepted into the program is a gift. Why would you jeopardize that?”
“I’m not a part of the breeding program. Besides, being in the breeding program is not a gift,” I said.
Her forehead wrinkled in confusion. “I’m not a part of the breeding program.”
“So, you’re a nanny then?” I said. “I hate to tell you this but looking after someone else’s brats isn’t a gift either.”
“You’re not here for the work program? There were rumours that they were bringing in more women, so I just assumed…” She looked me over. “I should have known. You don’t have the body type.”
“What are you talking about?” I said.
“I can’t tell you,” she said. “It’s a trial thing and not many people know. I just assumed you were hired to work in the castle like the rest of us or I wouldn’t have said anything.”
“C’mon, you gotta tell me now.” I grinned at her. “Pretty please?”
“I can’t,” she said.
“I have a cancerous tumour on my spine, and it’s spread to my lungs, liver, and kidneys,” I said. “And because of the whole stealing accusation, they’re sending me back to Earth today where I’ll be put in prison. I’m gonna be dead in like a week so who will I tell?”
“Oh my God.” A genuine look of sympathy crossed her face. “I’m really sorry to hear that, Ellis.”
“Sorry enough to tell me about this work program thing?”
She smiled. “How can I say no after that? So, a few months ago, I found out I had brain cancer.”
“Shitty,” I said.
“Tell me about it.” She shook her head. “But not surprising, right? Did you read the study that came out last year? They’re predicting that more than sixty percent of us will get some form of cancer before we’re sixty-five, and the numbers are only going to go up each year.”
“Holy shit,” I said.
“Right?” She glanced at the lab door before grabbing a chair and dragging it to the end of the bed. She sat down and slipped one shoe off before rubbing at her heel. “The government keeps saying it isn’t the atmosphere that’s causing all the cancer, but us lowers are the ones with the highest percentage of cancer, and we spend the most time outdoors or in crappy buildings, right? Most of us have shit jobs in buildings that don’t have filtered air. The cancer diagnoses in middles and uppers are significantly lower. Like, forty-five percent lower.”
I had no idea if what she was saying was true or not, but she certainly was passionate about the subject.
“So, you found out you had brain cancer…” I prompted.
“Yeah, so obviously I applied for the breeding program right away and lucky me – I’m one of the seventy percent of women with the necessary gene to carry an alien baby.”
“Lucky you,” I said.
“You don’t, huh?”
I shook my head. About four months ago, at a really low point, I’d gone in for the blood test to determine if I was breeding compatible. It had only taken seven years on the street for me to finally do it, and I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed when I didn’t come back as compatible.
Relieved. You know for a fact that even if you could carry their babies, no Draax would have asked you to breed a baby for them. It was a waste of time getting the test done.
Like always, shame and sorrow filled me up until I was almost drowning in it. Esther would still be alive if I had just tried a little harder, if I’d done a better job of seducing –
I shook myself out of my memories. What good did they do? Esther was dead and that was it. Nothing I said or did now would change that. I’d fucked up, and maybe getting cancer was just karma’s way of repaying me for killing my sister.
“Sorry,” I said to Inara. “What were you