was wearing him down and at this rate, he’d work himself into an early grave before he hit thirty-five.
Chapter 8
School was officially out of session for the holidays. Rebecca knew the excitement Amanda was feeling as the girl raced out of the schoolhouse. She’d felt it once herself. Christmas meant an entire day without chores. With waking to find a filled stocking and sometimes a small trinket or two. It hadn’t been much, but they’d all looked forward to it.
Of course, that elation turned into bitter resentment when she turned eighteen and was forced to leave the only home she’d ever known. That’s when she realized how miserable life was and Christmas was a bitter reminder of how pathetic a creature she grew into. Unwanted and unloved, she’d spent evenings staring into windows watching others celebrate while her stomach ached from being so empty. Of trying to find a warm place to bed down without anyone seeing her. Finding a safe place to sleep grew harder after the war. Most of the city was homeless then.
Rebecca pushed the dismal thoughts away, clasping the handle of the basket she had draped over her arm and pasted on a smile as Amanda ran over to her.
“What are you doing here?”
She lifted the basket. “I had to make a trip to the mercantile. Your grandmother said it was getting close to the end of the school day so I thought I’d wait so you could go with me.”
Amanda beamed a smile so bright at her, warmth rushed through her veins. The girl grabbed her arm and turned to a group of children near the front steps of the school.
“Hey,” she yelled. “This is my new Ma!”
As one, the kids said, “Hey, Mrs. Reilly.”
The name caused that warm sensation in her stomach to grow and race through her limbs. Mrs. Reilly. She liked the sound of that. If she married Caleb, that’s exactly who’d she be. Guilt stabbed her a moment later. Could she really marry him with such a big lie hanging between them?
Why do you care? Once you’re married, there isn’t anything he can do about it, anyway. Life has always treated you like something foul on the bottom of its shoe. Take what’s offered and don’t look back.
She’d lived by those words her entire adult life. Take what you need and think nothing else of it. Guilt has no place in your life when you have to scrape and steal to survive. That shouldn’t change just because she was in a new town.
But lying and stealing seemed—wrong now. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Caleb or his family in any way. They’d been kind to her, even though they knew nothing about her and treated her like she was a part of their family, which was why she laid awake at night wondering if her lies were going to catch up with her and what she’d do once they did.
Amanda linked her arm with hers and started toward town while talking a mile a minute. Where the girl got so much energy, she’d never know.
Rebecca kept her head down, discreetly looking at everyone walking around town. She’d not seen Hazel since the day she and Caleb had eaten in town and fear she’d run into her again made her cautious. She hoped she’d been passing through and not staying in Angel Creek.
Cassie and several girls were outside the mercantile hanging sprigs of greenery and red bows on the door and windows. She’d noticed another shop down the road with the same decorations. Everyone was getting ready for Christmas.
“How does your family celebrate the holidays?”
Amanda bounced before grinning. “Oh, Pa takes me to cut a tree and we spend the evening decorating it.”
“A tree?”
“Yep. It’s never very big, but it always looks pretty. He said my momma loved Christmas and insisted on a tree so he gets one so we don’t forget her.”
They’d never had a tree at the orphanage. She’d seen them in windows she’d looked into of the fancier houses in Charleston. They’d all been adorned with bows and small trinkets and packages lined the floor under them which told her the children living in those houses woke up to more than a single stocking filled with a handful of nuts and fruit.
“Pa always fixes a big meal with turkey and dressing and he always has gifts for us. It's not much but he always gets me a new frock and a game or two. And one