word" he wanted. He patted the seat beside him on the couch. Guess not.
"What's going on, Jerry?" I sat beside him, not worried when my robe opened over my knees.
"I've got to go back to Florida for business." He reached over and closed my robe. Closed it! Now I was worried.
"Still having management problems?" I scooted away to lean against the corner, putting several inches between us. He wanted to be distant? I could play that game.
"Yes, the new manager I hired needs training and I should have stayed longer when I was there before." Jerry stared at me. "The last time I left town, things happened here that I haven't forgotten."
Uh-oh. Those "things" had been my being unfaithful to Jerry with my former bodyguard. Jerry's thoughts were blocked, no surprise there. I sat up straight, trying to decide if I should grovel or not.
"You can trust me, Jerry. Rafe and I are just friends now." I didn't block my thoughts and let him see the truth there.
"I know you two are friends. But Valdez wants more than friendship. And once a man has been with you, Gloriana, you're damned hard to forget." Jerry eased closer, his gaze hot.
"I think I heard a compliment in there." I put my hand on his knee. "Jerry, I can't keep apologizing and I won't beg you to forgive me again. If you need more time . . ."
"I guess I do." He stared at my hand until I pulled it back into my lap. "I've been thinking about our relationship."
When a man admits he's been thinking about stuff like that, it can't be good. And I'd cheated. I was pretty sure having a demon inside me had made me weak enough to give into the urges I'd been feeling for my dear friend Rafe, but the urges had been there before the demon had come along and Jerry had figured that out. Well, actually, I'd burst out that info in a big confession. The whole fiasco had killed Jerry's pride, his trust in me and maybe his love. No wonder he'd been "thinking."
"Okay, spit it out, Jer. What's on your mind?" I was strangling on my breath, on my knotted insides that had worked their way up into my throat. I couldn't stand what he might say, but my imagination conjured up such horrible things, I hoped his words would be easier to take.
"I'm not over what you did. I keep seeing you and Valdez together." Jerry thumped his forehead hard with his fists and I gasped.
"I'm sorry. I don't know what else I can say." I wanted to reach out to him, but there was a wall between us as surely as if it had been bricks and mortar.
"I know. I heard your words, saw your tears. I know you love me." This time he squeezed his head between his hands until I was afraid his skull would crack. Jerry was being really hard on himself, trying to erase that image from his mind. If only that would work.
"I do love you. I have for over four hundred years." I couldn't stand it. I grasped his hand and pulled it away from his head.
"You and I have a pattern. This on-again, off-again love affair of ours. It ends when you become frustrated with my high-handed ways, as you call them, and you usually cut and run." Jerry opened his fist and gripped my hand. "You'd think I'd learn or you'd learn. That one of us would figure this thing out." He pulled my fingers to his lips, his tongue touching my knuckles lightly before he let them go. "But we never have."
"Yes, I run. I admit it. But we always agree that it's time for a break first." He blurred when my eyes filled with tears. "This time I stayed but . . ."
"Broke faith." The words were clipped, cold.
Had I finally pushed him too far? Wounded him too deeply for healing? I reached out to him, wanting to feel his arms around me. Needing his strength. He dragged me against him and laid my head against his chest.
"I'm so, so sorry, Jeremiah. What can I do to make this right?"
Jerry took a breath and I heard the slow beat of his heart. "What's done is done. If I can't get that picture of you and Valdez together out of my head?" His arms tightened almost painfully around me. "Then I suppose that's my problem."