Raine (Gods of the Fifth Floor #2) - M.V. Ellis Page 0,57
into my pocket and stormed back to my desk. So much for calming down. If anything, I was more worked up than I had been before. Everything Michelle had said had been true, and then some, and it was making me crazy.
It was only after I’d already knocked on Raine’s door that I realized what I was doing. I regretted it instantly, and hoped that he wouldn’t have heard me, so that I could crawl away and get my shit together.
“Come in.” Fuck.
I pushed the door open warily.
“Hi. What do you need?” I could think of a few things that had nothing to do with work, or the reason I was there. God, he was beautiful. Even the scar that ran from his lip to just beside his right nostril made him a smidge sexier. It fit him perfectly—something just a little broken to give an edge to the perfect. It felt like a metaphor.
“Did you hand in my employment paperwork to HR?”
“Yeah.” He hadn’t looked up since I’d entered the room, and resolutely continued to stare at his screen and peck away at the keyboard, while I lingered like a bad smell.
“Can I ask why?”
“I would have thought that was obvious.”
“Not really, given that it was in my desk drawer, and mine to do with what I wanted.”
“I did it because I wanted to, and because I could.”
“What about what I wanted? And my privacy? You can’t just go rifling through people’s drawers.” He stopped typing then, looked at me for the first time since I’d come into the room, and raised a mocking eyebrow,.
“What about your privacy? What do you have in the drawer that you need to keep a secret? Paper clips and tampons? Who gives a fuck? And as for what you wanted, you told me you’d already signed and filed the paperwork with HR, so I assumed you’d just ‘accidentally’ forgotten to submit it. Was I wrong?” His steely blue glare was a clear challenge.
“I was still making a decision. You know, thinking about it? I still am, actually. I have to go down to HR to complete the rest of the process. Nothing is set in stone. I can still withdraw my acceptance.”
“What’s to fucking think about, already? Why would you withdraw? It’s the opportunity of a lifetime.”
“It’s not as simple as that.”
“The fuck it isn’t. It’s every bit as simple as that. Simpler, even.”
“Maybe for you. But for me, there are other considerations.”
“You mean the fact that you’ve been fucking me.”
“Exactly. I don’t want people thinking I slept my way into the job.”
“Are you insane? You heard me yesterday showering you with praise for how well the Carlisle meeting went. That shit is real. You know I’m not the kind of person who says that type of thing, or anything for that matter, just to massage someone’s ego, but I do believe in credit where it’s due. You’ve earned every word, and then some. You need to worry less about what other people think, and get on with living your life. When you die, there’s going to be nobody’s name on your tombstone but yours.”
Easy for him to say when he owned the company, and I was the one sleeping with the boss. Everyone knew it was the woman who came off badly in situations like this, while the guy got either a pat on the back or a slap on the wrist. Sometimes both.
“It’s not just that. It’s a risk for me in ways it’s not for you.”
“You think I’ll screw you over.”
“I’m not saying that you will, but the possibility isn’t something I can ignore.”
“What if I promise not to?”
“I don’t think that’s a promise you can make now and know you’ll definitely keep.”
“So, you’re calling me a liar?”
“No. I’m saying that sometimes circumstances and intentions are two different things.”
“Semantics. Ultimately, part of the hesitation is because you don’t trust me, right?”
“I don’t distrust you. I just don’t have enough to go on right now, is all.”
“You don’t trust me. Which is smart. I don’t trust me, and I know me better than anyone does. Okay, so you’re worried about the risk. I get that, but what would you need to make you feel more comfortable about at least giving it a try?”
“I don’t want more money. It’s not about that.”
“I wasn’t talking about cash, but good to know that you weren’t trying to shake me down. It’s a very generous package, already. The salary and benefits are great too.” It