be best if we let Aunt Patty manage all your communications until the summer break.”
I plop onto the bed. The weight of utter defeat envelopes me. She holds all the cards. I try to mask my feelings but her smirk tells me she sees it, and she knows she’s won.
Sitting on the bed, Mother pats my hand saying, “You have an early flight tomorrow.” She lifts my chin, inspecting my face. “You might want to put some Clearasil on that bump tonight, dear. You need to make a good impression tomorrow. You can’t very well do it with a huge blemish on your face.”
She slaps her hands on her thighs, standing, as if the matter is settled. Turning to pull open my door, she says, “I think you’ll find that if you put your best foot forward, this can be a fresh start for you. Concentrate on meeting the right people.” Her overly plumped lips stretch into a condescending smile, “This really is what’s best for everyone, Amber.”
“Really, Mother? Sounds like it’s what’s best for you. Goodnight.” I turn and shove a shirt into my bag, feeling a cold shiver up my spine as I hear her last words….a low muttering of “ungrateful brat” as the door closes.
***
My nightmare crashes to its usual end, waking me with a start. My heart pounds as I come down from the rush. Shit! The dreams are back. I shake off the chills along with the images that flash in my mind of blood and a body lying on the floor.
Rubbing my face, I attempt to stifle the ache that always follows one of my nightmares. Vainly attempting to push the dread down, shove it away. A tear slides down my cheek, and I swipe it away. I can’t cry anymore. I can’t. Swinging my legs off the bed, I pull on a robe and venture downstairs, hoping to find my mother. Maybe after sleeping on it, she’ll see reason. As I descend the winding staircase, I formulate my arguments to win her over: it will improve our relationship, you can monitor my grades, and I can help with public appearances or charity work. I hate kissing her ass, but if it’s what I have to do to stay…I’ll have to suck it up. I take a deep breath, stand tall, and walk into the kitchen.
Elise putters around the kitchen making sure breakfast is ready, and coffee is available. The smell of warm eggs, sausage, bacon, and my favorite French roast fills the air. Her uniform is starched and expertly pressed. Her soft grey hair is pulled tightly into a bun, not a hair out of place, the very vision of the efficient housekeeper.
Her soft, withered face breaks into a smile as she glances up, but her smile doesn’t quite reach her soulful, green eyes. One look at her sad eyes makes it painfully obvious she has been informed of my departure. “Good morning, Amber. May I get you some eggs? Or better yet, I could make those waffles you like so much.”
“No, thank you, Elise. Have you seen my mother?”
“I’m sorry, Amber, but she left about an hour ago for her office. She had an early morning breakfast meeting.”
“She left…without saying goodbye?” Sighing, I shake my head. “She couldn’t even take a moment to say bye to me.”
“Would you like me to try her at the office?” Elise offers.
“That’s all right….I doubt it would make a difference. I take it she told you I’m leaving this morning for another school.”
“Yes, she told me you were going to Texas. I am to pack up your room and have your things sent to the college in Austin. Is there anything special I can send along with your things?”
“No….that won’t be necessary. Everything I want I can fit in my bags. Don’t bother to send the clothes and all the other stuff.” I smile lovingly and squeeze her hand. “You always do so much for me. Do I tell you thank you enough Elise?”
“No thanks necessary, sweetie. I love taking care of you.”
The tears pool as I focus on my feet. “Elise, why does she hate me? I’ve tried to be what she wanted me to be. I really did.” I whisper, “It never seems to be enough.”
Elise rounds the kitchen island, taking me in her comforting arms, enveloping me in a big bear hug. “Oh, Amber…it’ll be all right.” Rubbing my back softly, she hugs me. She pulls back to look lovingly into my eyes.