Nic by the arms. “Don’t forgive me. Please.”
Nic pulled his elbows free of Aron’s grip, giving him a strange look. “Why? Do you enjoy torturing yourself with guilt?”
“It’s not that.” Aron almost grabbed Nic again. He wanted to shake Nic, make him take back his pardon. “It’s—without the guilt, I—”
Aron closed his mouth because he didn’t have words for the rest, but Nic seemed to pick up the thread. “You see the guilt as a restraint. An assurance you won’t take the wrong action, or make more mistakes like the one you made with me when you demanded that I live.”
To this, Aron had no response, because it was exactly correct. Heat crept up his neck, threatening to overtake his face, and he felt helpless against Nic’s ability to read his meaning, and against his own reaching for the truth. The more he used his graal, it seemed, the less comfortable he became with lies, even the sort of fibs people told themselves and one another to ease life’s daily wounds.
“I think you should trust yourself more than that.” Nic took Aron’s wrist and pulled him forward, toward the Den. “I think you’ll sail through your trial, and become one of the strongest Stone Brothers ever known. You’ll probably draw the stone on Canus the Bandit, and I’ll applaud you when you choke the life from that child-stealing, thieving sack of waste.”
Aron kept pace with Nic, unable to completely shake the lingering dread and misery that had gripped him when Nic finally broached the subject of Aron’s brutal intervention in Nic’s life. His swirl of emotions prevented him from exercising restraint, and he immediately brought up the other subject he had so wanted to explore with Nic. “You’ve seen him. Canus the Bandit. You’ve spoken to him, face-to-face.”
“Yes.” Nic’s legs ratcheted forward, keeping him ahead of Aron, as if the memory stole his ability to fully attend to his body’s movements. “I thought at first that it might have been his men who attacked us. Snakekiller says it wasn’t, but who knows if that outlaw has managed to corrupt Guardsmen to his wishes.”
Aron eyed the entrance to the Den courtyard, just ahead of them. “Lord Baldric says he’s stealing back supplies confiscated by Guard troops and feeding villages—and snatching children to ‘protect’ them from disappearing. That’s why Lord Ross won’t issue a writ against him. Lord Ross says he’s the only man in Dyn Brailing still defending the common people.” Aron glanced at the sky, judging time by the skies. “Canus the Bandit is gaining so many followers, he’s becoming a guild unto himself—almost a rogue dynast lord.”
Nic turned his head and spat on the ground to express his disgust. When he looked back at Aron, Aron saw anger—a rare thing, he knew, where Nic was concerned.
Nic’s voice shook as he said, “It’s a sad thing, that goodfolk have to turn to the likes of Canus the Bandit for protection from their own soldiers and nobles.”
A halo of red formed around Nic’s body, and Aron found himself easing to the side to give Nic more space as they walked. In that moment, Aron could imagine Nic’s body straight and whole. He could see Nic standing fierce and tall, wielding a sword against any who sought to do harm in Eyrie.
“You told me I should trust myself,” Aron murmured, increasing the distance between himself and Nic. “Maybe it’s you who should trust yourself.”
They crossed through the archway, Aron so far to Nic’s left that his fingers brushed the stone supports. The courtyard was empty, and Aron knew very few people would be in the keep itself, since it was during training hours.
As they approached the Den’s big wooden doors, Nic said, “You think I could be king.”
“I do.” Aron glanced at Nic again, still wary of the red fog of graal power ringing Nic. “In fact, I have no doubt.”
• • •
Later, when Dari opened her chamber door to admit them, Aron lost himself in her smile, in each brief touch as he and Nic seated themselves beside her in preparation for the lesson. He was looking forward to the close contact with her, even if his lessons were more disturbing now, as she taught him how to focus the full essence of his graal and actually use it deliberately. They had touched on truth-sensing, truth-seeking, and being open to truths in the environment. They had even practiced compelling small animals to do his will, which he found distasteful, but also