escaped to the car.
Aero climbed in beside me a few minutes later and didn’t say a word until we were on the freeway.
“You need to vent, Letti, vent it out. Don’t bury it.”
“You shot them.”
“I did.”
I knew he carried. All the Howlers’ carried guns. I just didn’t really think about them using their guns.
“Who taught you to shoot?”
“Hatch,” he said.
“Dad cleaned it up.”
“In a manner of speaking, yes,” he confirmed.
I nodded, the sting of tears hitting my nose. I swallowed convulsively as I rolled his words through my mind. It’s not like I didn’t know what my father’s club was capable of. It’s also not like I didn’t know that, just like my father, Aero would do anything, anything to make sure I was safe.
Now I had to figure out if my emotional state was just shock—because it was totally shocking to see someone shot dead in front of you—or if the rubber had finally met the road and I needed to determine if this was the life for me.
If I was in, I had to be all in. The choice was mine, but it had to be final.
Aero reached his hand out to me, linking his fingers with mine, saying nothing. I squeezed his hand but continued to stare out the window as we drove home.
* * *
Aero
Violet said nothing for the rest of the drive, and although she gripped my hand like a talisman, I knew she was battling demons I couldn’t fight for her. She had to work it out herself and I knew we were at a make or break moment.
Things were good with us. Really good. I’d never loved another person more than I loved her, and I knew she felt the same about me.
But…
This life wasn’t for everyone. Hell, it wasn’t for most, and it didn’t matter if you were raised in it, prospected for it, or were already in it. There still came a point in the process where you had to make a choice. All in or all out. There was no in between.
However, the thought that she might not choose me, gutted me. I don’t think I could live without her and I hoped to God she chose the club because the thought of leaving my brothers gutted me almost as much.
But I would. I’d give it all up for her and I wouldn’t look back. Lifting her hand to my lips I kissed it gently, but she didn’t look at me. Just continued to stare out the window as we drove.
I kept hold of her hand until I had to release it to park the car.
We headed up to my place silently, but once we were inside, Violet faced me. The look she gave me made my heart race, mostly because it was blank. Her normally expressive face didn’t give anything away. She gripped my cut, leaning up on her tiptoes as she kissed me gently and far too quickly. I cupped her face, but she pulled away, stepping back, and my gut churned.
I fisted my hands at my sides and waited. She had to work it out herself. As much as it killed me, I wouldn’t force anything from her.
“I have never seen anyone killed before. Hell, I’ve never seen a dead body before. Not a human one, anyway,” she said, pacing the living room. “Dad wouldn’t even let us see Mom until she was dressed and done up in her casket and I remember her just looking like she was asleep.” She shook her hands out as she paced, then began to wring them in front of her.
I dragged my hands down my face, then crossed my arms in an effort not to react. Not to interject.
She stopped pacing and focused on me. “I didn’t like it.”
No, I don’t expect she did.
“I don’t ever want to see that again.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
“Will you promise me I will never see that again?”
I opened my eyes and met hers. “Not sure I can promise that, Letti.”
She breathed out through her nose in a long huff before she pressed her lips together and nodded. “God, I wish you’d given me a different answer.”
I did, too, right about now.
I was done letting her spiral. “Okay, I’m gonna—”
She held her hand up. “Wait. I need to get this out, Jasper.”
I crossed my arms again and nodded.
“It is not lost on me that everything that happened this morning had nothing to do with the club, and that