but it’s not like she would’ve cared. She’s still kind of pissed at me for ditching her at Urban. Then again, it wasn’t like I had a choice. A scowl forms across my face at the reminder, Dean Carter’s features coming to my mind. I imagine reaching out and punching him in his perfectly straight nose. I want to see it crooked and broken. Blood in his teeth. I wonder if he’d still have that same callous look he had the last time I saw him.
Fucking prick. I bet he would.
I’m about five miles outside of Eastpoint—the city, not the university—and the farther away I get, the easier breathing feels. I hadn’t even realized I was suffocating under their thumb. At first, it’d just been the party, but then with what happened at the club, it appears I’m no longer allowed to just have my anonymity.
If one more fucking bitch tries to cuddle up to me in class, I’m going to stab their eyes out with a pencil, I swear inwardly. I blame them for what I’m about to do. It’s completely their fault. The Sick Boys.
Had it not been for Dean’s proclamation, I wouldn’t now be dealing with everyone on campus and their fucking brother trying to metaphorically climb into my pants. Oh, no. No one is allowed to touch me. To touch me would mean pissing off the King of the castle. But everyone wants to be my friend and they’re not even attempting to hide their intentions. I fucking hate people.
The bus slows to a stop and I check the map once more before I get up and start to move towards the front. The stranger’s eyes dart up and when he catches me glaring his way, he ducks once more.
“Hey!” the driver snaps. “No moving while the bus is still going.” But the bus is already almost stopped. I flip him the bird, swipe the bus card I purchased earlier, and push the doors open before he has a chance to chastise me anymore. I really don’t have the energy to deal with his shit today.
My legs move with purpose as I stride to the end of the street and hang a right, following the path I memorized earlier. There, at the end of the second road is the hiking trail I came all the way out here for. I’m not wearing the right shoes for hiking—hell, I don’t have any. So halfway up the first hill, I can already feel it in the soles of my feet. I inhale the pain and let it rise up through my legs. It’s all just a precursor to what I’m really here for.
Dean fucking Carter thinks he can control me. He and his friends think that because they have all the money in the world that everyone around them will fall to their knees and do what they want. But that’s just not who I am.
I’m not the girl who lets anyone control her.
I’m the girl that you warn your children about.
Monsters don’t go bump in the motherfucking night, Avalon Manning does.
I reach the top of the final hill, feeling the ache in my calves like a wave of anxiety right before a swimmer’s dive. Despite the pain, though, the second I see what I’ve come for, everything else fades away.
A giant lake with waters that are green with age, moss, and algae. There’s no telling what’s beneath their depths. I take a step towards it, spotting a flat cliffy surface on the other side of the giant walls that surround it. It looks high. It looks dangerous. It looks perfect.
When I reach the flat cliff, I unload my bag, dropping it and my pants to the ground. I strip my shirt over my head until I’m clad in nothing but my underwear and bra. Scrubbing a hand down my face, I take a step towards the edge and look down. One wrong move and I could slip. I could fall. Hell, there’s no telling what’s beneath the surface. Could be rocks. Venomous snakes. My heart begins to race, and I shiver as a cool breeze drifts across my face while I pull my hair back and secure it into a ponytail.
Every time is like the first time. I close my eyes, thinking back to the very first time I realized I was just as fucked up as Patricia and the rest of the addicts that lived in my trashy trailer park. Everyone was an addict. She'd taught