okay, though. He was not being pinched to death. He was, however, face to face with a medium-sized, scaly creature sitting on his chest, whose beady little eyeballs constantly rolled around in their sockets. There was no room for logical thought in his sleep-addled brain, just primordial action. He let out a surprised yelp and cursed loudly.
“Holy fuck!”
The critter startled, and Cole displaced it as he sat bolt upright, his hip twinging at the sudden movement. When a blond head popped up unexpectedly near his elbow, he let out another surprised cry, rearing away from the edge and cursing for the second time. “Jesus fucking Christ.”
The child regarded him curiously. “Mommy says you’re not supposed to cuss.”
In the distance, Cole could hear a rather panicked-sounding “Finnnnnn?”
The little boy shook his head solemnly at Cole as he scooped up what appeared to be a multi-hued chameleon from the neat pile of his folded clothes, which had been placed on the coverlet at the foot of the bed. “Now you’re in trouble.”
Before he could wrap his head around the rapid sequence of events, the woman from last night—or the night before; who knew how long he’d been asleep—came crashing through the door. Her hair was in a ponytail this time, and she was wearing a lot more clothes—a pair of denim shorts that cut off just above her knees and a T-shirt that had a picture of a screwdriver with This is not a drill emblazoned beneath.
His lips twitched. Hell, so did his dick. Maybe it hadn’t ditched in the Pacific after all.
“Finn,” she said, her voice stern, her face screwed into a scowl. “I told you not to come in here.”
Finn pointed at Cole. “He said the f-word. Two times.”
Cole blinked as the kid threw him under the bus and the mom turned her scowl on him. “What?” he demanded. “I woke to a wild animal an inch from my face.”
She quirked an eyebrow. “It’s a chameleon, not a grizzly bear.”
“It startled me.”
Christ, he sounded whiney. He got mauled by grown men for a living, for crying out loud. Or he had, anyway… Cole glanced at the pretty creature lounging along Finn’s forearm, regarding him lazily. It sported a vibrant blue, red, and yellow pattern and looked as exotic and harmless as a butterfly.
“I apologize for the interruption, Mr. Hauser.” There was reproach in her voice, but Cole wasn’t sure if it was meant for him or the boy. She waved Finn over to her side. “It won’t happen again.”
Before he could add anything, she’d turned them both around and stalked for the door, shutting it behind them with a firm click.
Cole stared at the space where they’d been for long seconds. Raising his arm, he glanced at his watch through eyes scratchy as Velcro. Just after two in the afternoon. He’d slept for almost twelve hours. And he still felt shattered.
He fell back against the mattress. Mr. Hauser? She’d obviously done some fact-checking. Stupidly, he smiled at the idea. Very, very stupidly. No point getting all goofy over a mommy when presumably there was a daddy around somewhere.
Jesus. Where was the daddy? Had he crawled into bed with a married chick last night? He tried to remember if she’d been wearing a ring, but hell, he’d been barely functioning last night when she’d menaced him with a pair of pliers. She certainly hadn’t screamed for a dude, and none had come rushing to her aid. She’d been alone, apart from Finn.
Didn’t mean there wasn’t a husband, a partner, around somewhere, though.
Cole didn’t sleep with unavailable women, although god knew he’d had ample opportunity. It was surprising the number of women with wedding rings who were up for some no-strings fun when you were a sports superstar.
But he didn’t cross that line. Ever. Apart from last night, apparently…
But it had been a mistake. Inadvertent. Surely that would placate her partner? Cole tried to think if he’d be mollified by such an excuse if some guy had crawled into bed with his girlfriend/wife.
He doubted it.
Which meant next he might be woken by a knuckle sandwich instead of a scaly reptile.
And at another time, that might have caused concern, but Cole was just too damned tired to worry about angry husbands as a wave of fatigue swept over him again, fluttering his eyes closed. He dragged the nearby pillow over his head and sank into the abyss one more time.
It was still daylight when Cole awoke, but the bright sunshine had mellowed, and