because I’d been too distracted by her eyes’ amber glow. “Can I help with anything?”
She accepted the offered latte and took a sip, letting out a little moan that went straight to my dick. “This is helping more than you know. And don’t you have court?”
I felt like the world’s biggest asshole in that moment. I hadn’t even kept Kenna up-to-date on the case. “The judge is ruling tomorrow.”
Kenna had stayed away from court for the past three days, but closing arguments had been made this morning, and Judge Moore had told us he would rule tomorrow. Hotchkiss had made a compelling statement to wrap things up, but I was still hopeful.
“Wow, I can’t believe this might finally be over. What time?”
“Nine a.m. Do you need a ride or anything?” I wanted her to say that she did. Any excuse for a little more time with her.
Kenna shook her head. “I can take my car. Or Bell or Caelyn might want to go, too.”
I wasn’t in her trusted circle anymore. I’d wanted to be the person who never let her down. I’d failed completely on that account. But maybe I could prove to Kenna that I was worth having in her life, even if it wasn’t in the way I wanted. “I’m sorry.”
She blinked a few times. “For what?”
“Being an ass on the beach the other day. You deserve to be happy. To have everything you want. I just wish I could be that guy for you.”
46
Kenna
“I’m sorry. He said what?” Bell dropped her spoon into the open container of ice cream.
I worked at my cookie dough with my spoon, trying not to let the tears escape. “He said that he wished he could be that guy for me.”
“Holy swoon, Batman.” Caelyn collapsed against the couch. “That is so romantic.”
Bell pointed her spoon at Caelyn. “It’s not romantic. He needs to get his shit together and be that guy for her.”
“He’s not there yet.” He might never be. But I did have hope that if Crosby ever got to the place of wanting more, he’d let me know.
Bell turned to me. “And where does that leave you? Waiting around, hoping he’ll pull his finger out of his butt and realize that you aren’t his bitch of an ex, and that building a life with you isn’t living with a ball and chain?”
Caelyn screwed up her face. “Why is his finger in his butt? I really don’t get that saying.”
“Ugh, it doesn’t matter,” Bell groaned. “What matters is that he’s still stringing Kenna along. She needs to move on and find someone worthy of her.” Bell glanced at me. “Just not another snooze-fest accountant, okay?”
I grimaced down at my ice cream. I did not want another Henry. I wanted Crosby. And I had a feeling that no other man would ever make me feel alive in the same way, cared for and safe, but without clipping my wings. “I’m not looking to jump back into the dating pool anytime soon.”
Bell sent Caelyn a look. “She’s still holding out hope.”
“Wouldn’t you?” Caelyn argued. “Crosby is perfect for her.” She turned to me. “I really think he’s going to come around. Just give him a little time to realize what he’s missing.”
“Don’t listen to the hopeless romantic. You need to move on. You know how the saying goes, the best way to get over one guy is to get under someone else,” Bell argued.
I cringed at the thought. Every cell in my body revolted at the idea, and I started to feel a little nauseous. “Don’t push, Bell. I need to heal in my own way, in my own time.”
Bell groaned. “She’s going to become a hermit.”
“I am not. I’m setting up my new business. I have you, Caelyn, and the kiddos. I’ve even started to come around on that sketchy Ford character.”
Bell snorted. “Who would’ve thought we’d ever see the day?”
I felt a trickle of guilt at the reminder of how tough I’d been on Ford when he came back to town. He loved my best friend with a ferocity I hadn’t thought possible. “I think he’s worth keeping around.”
My stomach twisted again. This time, I felt like I was sailing on an especially rough sea. I set my ice cream down, taking a deep breath in through my nose and letting it out of my mouth.
“Kenna, are you okay?” Caelyn was instantly by my side.
“I’m not feeling so good all of a sudden.” I was clammy, and the nausea was only