foregone conclusion, but I’d deal with that later.
"He has a knack for it, spooky sometimes," laughing with her head tilted back a little dramatic, it wasn’t that funny, clearly enjoying knowing Daniel more than I, well, how long will that last I wonder?
"How long have you been working with Daniel, Steffi?" I put my bag on the floor, glad to break our eye lock for a moment, and it suddenly feels like the heaviest thing to be carrying.
"Oh, Danny and I go way back,” she brushes a strand of perfectly blow-dried and straightened hair from flawlessly made-up face as if to exaggerate all the ways she and I are different. Bloody hell, this could take a while.
“We, Daniel and I,” the infliction in her clipped remarks telling, she's letting the words sink in, watching me closely, “we were together a long time ago.” She pauses for effect. “Over now of course." She looks me up and down and smirks to herself...well not quiet to herself, it's deliberate I’m sure. How much did he tell her? "We've been working on RANDom for a few years, when he decided he wanted a womenswear label, he left the men’s side to me and began his research. Danny loves to research, he says its brain input to get the output." Suddenly she seems to be happy remembering, and it's gone as soon as it arrives, poof! I take a deep audible breath that makes Steffi stare, because in my thoughts I say a similar thing myself, who is this guy?
"Danny knew he wanted you for Milk&Honey from the beginning, but he said he had work to do before he could approach you with a proposition you couldn’t refuse." Satisfied there’s nothing about me she isn’t better at, she relaxes a little. Suddenly I’m regretting not tidying myself up, my nails are short and blunt with chipped black nail polish…Vogue tells us chipped is OK this season, so that's a relief. Is this Daniels type? I start reeling in my thoughts, it's going to get messy up there soon, cold, deliberate, immaculately turned out, over-active sense of superiority, and sheer beauty. I look down at myself briefly, admittedly I’m not looking my best this morning, but a plain looking, unironed, second hand parka wearing woman, skinny with messy hair and I likely have an air of the outdoors about me too, bloody hell, am I going to hate it here?
MXK medium trot.
“He didn’t ask anyone else.” She looks pained as she tells me, he didn’t offer it to her, maybe that’s why she hates me?
KAF collected trot.
I feel flattered. "I am looking forward to working with you all," I say without a trace of anxiety I am proud of myself, I'm good at denim, but strangers is another thing I don’t do well.
FB shoulder-in left.
I took my Mum's advice not to talk to strangers very seriously, and trust issues prevailed into adulthood. But my friendly smile and my fake confidence in dealing with people usually gets me through with your common-all-garden varieties. To those more perceptive, confusion turns to mild understanding, shy is a word I rarely use, but I guess that’s what I am, a warm, friendly, noisy, passionate, energetic, neurotic, shy person. Horses don't care about that, thank goodness. No one understands it unless the really want to see it, that’s what the headphones are for, distance myself from the world. The things themselves suggest to people to back off I’m not listening, but it also has the effect of shutting off my voices, talking in my head running things, information, words, over and over and over , thinking and talking, loud thumpy music is louder. I can concentrate. I can work.
B, volte left. That does the trick, voltes are tricky after all...
Note to self, remember to ask Liza, again, what volte is. It's her version of the off-side rule, nobody really understands it, unless they breathe that world, dressage that is, are you keeping up? Good.
I'm standing there in front of Steffi, and longing for a fresh cup of tea, my Bose headphones and some very loud Korn or maybe some Placebo. The third man sitting at the desk rises, with his phone still to his ear, gesticulating to me with an air borne rotation of his closed hand, he’s sorry for the distraction, his conversation one sided, not his side. Only one person can drive you that crazy, Mothers! He's just listening, eyes roll to indicate to me he's being lectured..."OK