hadn't even known they existed? And not just anyone, a freaking god.
'I'm drawn to him in a way I've never felt before,' I admitted. 'I can't explain it.' Hecate stood up, gathering our empty glasses.
'Well he is sexy as fuck,' she said, as she strode to the counter.
'I think it might be more than that. I'm worried... I'm worried that now I've met him, nobody will ever make me feel like that again.'
She gave a soft laugh.
'Gods help us when you do actually screw him.'
'That's not happening,' I said firmly. 'It won't help either of us when I leave-' I broke off and she turned to me.
'When you leave? Do you still not believe you can win this?'
Trust nobody. The voice from the Atlas garden rattled through my mind.
'Well, nothing is certain,' I said evasively.
'Hmmm,' she said, and turned back to the cocktails.
I needed to change the subject again.
'So what about you? Do you have anyone that makes your brain go wonky?'
She sighed heavily and I frowned. That hadn't been the reaction I'd expected.
'Persy, I'm gonna tell you something,' she said, bringing two full glasses back to the couch.
'OK.'
'You know when I told you that I had hundreds of lovers?'
'Yeah.'
'That was a lie.'
'OK,' I said, cocking my head at her.
'I don't have any lovers.'
'Then why lie?'
'Because I don't have any lovers, ever. And never have.' She took a long swig of her drink, looking away from me.
'Oh,' I said, trying to hide my surprise.
'People judge me when they find out I'm celibate, so I lie.' Her tone was defensive and my mind churned into gear, trying to imagine what a life without sex would be like. I mean, I wasn't exactly an expert, but it had certainly livened up the last few years of my life, even if the guys had been temporary.
But that was my life, and Hecate must have her reasons for not wanting sex.
'Who the hell am I to judge you?' I said to her. 'You choose what to do with your body.' She glanced at me, her eyes more emotional than I'd seen them before.
'I wish it was my damned choice,' she muttered.
'It's not?' I frowned.
'It's complicated.' Her easy cool was returning now, and she leaned back into the couch, hooking her ankle over her other knee and sipping from her drink. 'One of my more unpleasant powers is necromancy,' she said. An involuntary shudder took me at the thought. Zombies had always scared the shit out of me. 'In an ideal world,' she continued, 'I would never have to use that power. But in the event of a cataclysmic fuck up it might be extremely important. Because, out of all the gods, only Hades and I can do it. Thanatos and the Fates can incite actual death, but we're the only ones who can animate corpses and control the souls of the dead.' I worked hard to keep the revulsion from my face.
'What kind of fuck up would require you to do that?'
She let out a long breath.
'Hades losing control of the Underworld. Or being removed from Olympus completely. The undead are one of the few things that could topple the gods.'
My breath caught. Hades removed from Olympus... Was that god-speak for him dying? I thought he was immortal?
'Could... Could that happen?'
'In Olympus, anything could happen,' she said a little bitterly. I took a steadying gulp of my cocktail.
'So you're his back up?'
'Kind of, yeah. And a power that dark must be balanced out. Hades has sacrificed parts of his own soul, physically lost pieces of himself to the Underworld. He is too strong, the demands on his power too high for him to live any other way. But for me, I learned that I could make a personal sacrifice, and keep my soul intact.'
'So you gave up sex?'
'I was a virgin when I came here, and physical love was what I wanted most back then. It was the greatest sacrifice I could make to save my soul.'
'But you didn't give up love? Just sex?'
'Persy, point me at a man who will love you without touching you,' she said, and this time her voice was full of bitterness. 'And besides, why put myself through the temptation? Why fall in love with someone and never be able to physically express it? The moment I gave in and lost my virginity, I would lose my most valuable power.'
'Shit,' I said quietly.
'Yeah.'
'But what if you never need to use that power? Surely Hades isn't going anywhere, he's like