kid, or maybe you wanted a son. I was a disappointment to you. Or maybe having a family was just too much for you to handle and I’d been the last straw.”
He took my cold hands, pressing them between his warm ones. “Never,” he said firmly. “That was never the reason. You, Gwen, your mother, you were my life…my everything.”
I nodded. “I know that now. But that fear was always there, ready to jump out and bite me. It was that fear that drove me to become who I am now. Pushed me, forced me to be better, to excel in ways I didn’t expect. Your absence shaped me, maybe differently than if you’d been at home, but we’ll never know. And the thing is, Dad, I like myself. And I like you, too. I admire you for standing up for others even at the expense of your own life. That’s called integrity, and among all the attributes I’ve learned you have—brilliance, adaptability, kindness, and self-sacrifice—I think I’m the most impressed by your integrity. I’m proud to be your daughter.”
I heard him draw in a sharp breath, and he squeezed my hands. “I have a confession, too. I’ve been stalking you and your sister all your life. I couldn’t be there in person with you, but every accomplishment, ever milestone, I celebrated with you. You and Gwen, I’m so proud of both of you and the young women you’ve become. Except your sister has moved in with her boyfriend, and I’m not sure how I feel about that.”
“He’s a great guy, Dad. He really likes her, and I’ve never seen her happier.”
“If you say so,” he said, but I could tell he was still unsure about it.
“You know, Dad, now we’ve come full circle,” I said. “It’s fate, perhaps. Without even knowing you, I’ve stepped into the same life you had.”
“With better skills than I had at your age,” he added. “And you’re a lot smarter. But there’s still a few things I can show you.”
“I bet there are,” I said, smiling. “I’m looking forward to it.” I really was. Talking coding and computers with my dad was something I’d always dreamed of doing.
“Did you know I had a college fund set up for you and Gwen before I disappeared?” he asked. “Did Mom tell you?”
“She did.”
“Well, Gwen used hers, but now you’re at UTOP and it’s tuition-free. What are you going to do with that money? Buy a car?”
“Dad, I don’t even have a driver’s license yet.”
“Well, that won’t stop your UTOP professors from teaching you how to drive.”
“I know,” I said glumly. “I’m good at virtual driving, but I’m scared to death to go on-road, especially after riding with Frankie. She’s the scariest thing behind the wheel I’ve ever experienced. What if I turn out like her?” I glanced over at him. “How about you, Dad? Are you a good driver?”
“I’m decent, but I’m sure you’ll eventually outperform me in this area.”
“I guess I’ll find out.” I stood up, and so did Dad. “Let’s go back inside. I’m getting cold out here, and I could use another piece of pizza.”
“Me, too, Bitsy.” He reached out and pulled me into his arms, hugging me tight. “Thank you for believing in me and never giving up hope for all those years. You’ll never know how much that means to me.”
I hugged him back, closing my eyes for a moment. He thought I didn’t know how much it meant, but I did. Because, despite his physical absence from my life, he’d never given up on me either.
Hand in hand, we returned to the noisy living room and sat down. As I ate my pizza, laughed, and looked around at the faces that surrounded me, I had a flashback to the first day of my last day of high school—the 5,802nd day of my existence. I got dumped into the swimming pool by the school bully and later surprised myself by standing up to that same bully for Frankie Chang, who’d become my first real friend.
So much had changed. I had changed…and for the better.
I’d never be that loner girl again, afraid to trust, even if I got hurt. I was still a work in progress, but aren’t we all? While I knew I’d likely face more problems and issues in the future, those problems didn’t have to be solved right now. Tonight, I would live in the present, count my blessings, and hang out with my friends and family.
I couldn’t think