I want to ascend to that plane with him and fly through galaxies of bliss like we’ve done in the past.
But he stops. His lips still. His entire body turns to stone. “I have to leave. I came to say goodbye.”
“No!” My chest collapses as tears fill my eyes.
Struggling against his hold, I twist until he lets me go. “You can’t leave me. Don’t you see? That’s how he wins. If you leave, it’s Sloan’s ultimate victory. He did this to keep us apart!”
Derek’s beautiful grey eyes look deeply into mine, and I ache seeing his internal torment. “I can’t control this, and I won’t risk hurting you. There’s no other way.” His voice lowers. “I’ve been alone before. I just have to do it again.”
“You would never hurt me.” Stepping forward, I tuck my head under his chin and slide my arms around his waist. “There’s always another way.”
He starts to embrace me, but resists. “You don’t understand. I’ve tasted your blood. Your blood is part of what made me. I want you so badly, I can’t promise what I won’t do.”
A shiver of desire moves through me. “I do understand. I’ve been where you are. Let me help you.”
He gives in, and for a few golden moments he holds me.
“My humanity kept you safe from me.” My voice is consoling, soothing. “I knew I couldn’t live without you, even in that state.”
“That’s the point.” He pulls back. Large hands cup my cheeks, and he forces me to look at him. “No humanity is left in me. Melissa, I would steal your life with no remorse. I would be the most selfish monster you’ve ever encountered.”
“Sloan was the most selfish monster I’ve ever encountered,” I argue. “I would give you everything. You only have to ask.”
He’s completely apart from me now, taking several steps into the woods. His head drops, and his hands go into his long, wavy locks. Pushing them back, he straightens, his broad shoulders, his beautiful back to me.
“Stuart wants to see if…” He exhales deeply. “If I can’t find a way to handle this, to control it, I’m ending it.”
“NO!” Ice floods my veins, and I rush forward, clutching his arms, my cheek against his back. “Come back to me. I’ll wait for you.”
“I won’t take your life.”
They’re his final words before he steps out of my grasp and disappears into the darkness.
I try to follow him, but he’s too fast, moving at vampire speed. The woods are empty, and I’m alone. Still I push forward, needing to feel him, dying at the thought he might end his life. Doesn’t he understand? By doing so, he would end mine as well.
“Derek!” My voice breaks, a desperate cry. I’m too weak, too blind now to chase him into the dark swamp. It wouldn’t matter anyway. He’s gone.
Everything in me collapses. I’m on my knees when Elaine appears at my side. Wordless, as we don’t need words, she lifts me by the shoulders.
“Come inside now.” She’s holding me, keeping me close. “I’ve got you.”
Otherwise, she knows I’d run after him into the night, to my death.
* * *
Derek
The depth of my desire for Melissa is overwhelming. Her blood hums in her veins, making my heart race at the sight of her. I want to change her. I want her to be mine for immortality. I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want her.
Walking away from her tonight was excruciating. It was like ripping my insides out and leaving them on the ground at her feet. Nothing in my human life compared to the pain of leaving her there.
I wanted more—one last night, but I knew as I held her, smelled her, allowed her gorgeous essence to flood my senses, I’d never make it through a night with her. I’ve tasted her blood. I’ve risen to the heights of ecstasy with her. She would be a vampire before dawn.
Worse, she wouldn’t fight me. She wanted the thunder of our lovemaking as much as I did. Oh, god. How can I live without my soul?
Running is the only thing that saves us both. I won’t rob her of her life. I can’t hold myself back from the thing I crave above all. There’s always another way. Her words echo in my head. If only they can be true. I have to find a way to make them true.
Back in my suite in the Royal Sonesta, I can barely tolerate the scent of shifter blood in my tub. No