word spread that we had arrived, people would come for treatment from miles around. Sometimes we could help with their problems. Sometimes all we could offer was our prayers. No one ever left Frère Emmanuel’s presence without feeling blessed and happier.”
“What about your presence? Did the local girls try to lure you into sin?”
Lucas made a face. “Occasionally. I gained a reputation for being boring and pious so they soon gave up.”
Kendra suspected that would have made some girls try even harder to catch his attention, but Lucas must have learned how to be politely evasive. “I imagine it would have reflected badly on Frère Emmanuel if you succumbed to temptation.”
“Yes, and worse, he would have been disappointed in me. I didn’t want that.”
They’d left the city behind and were now among rolling green hills. Kendra imagined the two men, one old and one young, riding side by side on their humble mounts through similar hills. “He sounds like an extraordinary man.”
“Frère Emmanuel had a saint’s kindness and faith, and he lived with one foot in heaven.” Lucas smiled a little. “I couldn’t match his saintliness, but I was good at dealing with worldly matters.”
“Did he urge you to take vows?”
“No, he was too wise for that. He said I shouldn’t become a friar unless I felt I had a true vocation. I never did.” After a long pause, he continued, “After Frère Emmanuel died, I realized how much my devotion was to him and to the healing skills I’d learned from him. They were what gave purpose to my life.”
“You’ve lost him, which perhaps makes it even more important that you resume your healing work,” she said quietly.
His brows furrowed. “I hadn’t thought of it in those terms, but you’re right. Healing is essential to my spirit. But it’s not enough.”
She cocked her head. “What would ‘enough’ look like?”
His smile was rueful. “I have no idea. I think we both share the state of not knowing quite who we are.”
His words struck with the force of a ringing bell. Kendra had once defined herself as a mother and an estate manager and a very detached wife. Now she’d lost her child and her estate and was permanently detached from her husband. She was glad that she was no longer Denshire’s wife, but what was she? And what did she want to be?
She wanted to be a strong woman. She wanted to be a mother again. Most of all, she wanted to be in control of her life, not a helpless victim.
Her gaze slanted to Lucas. Once she would also have said that she wanted to be single and unencumbered by a husband. She was beginning to rethink that.
CHAPTER 15
The weather had been dry for several days, so they made good time. It was late afternoon when Lucas said, “The next turn will take us into Camden Keep.”
Kendra had been drowsing, but the announcement brought her fully awake. “Do your aunt and uncle know that you’re coming? And that you’re bringing a guest?”
“I sent a note to let them know,” he assured her.
She wondered if he’d explained that his guest was the notorious Lady Denshire. He was sanguine about their reactions to her, but men were often somewhat dense about such matters. Of course, this was Lucas, who noticed more than most men.
As they turned through an open gate, she gazed out at the well-tended fields and the masses of daffodils. “Spring is such a beautiful time to be in the country. This estate is well kept and lovely.”
“When Uncle William retired from India, he decided to dedicate himself to becoming a proper gentleman farmer, and anything he does, he does well.”
The road turned into a curving drive in front of a sprawling house that was a patchwork quilt of styles from different eras. Delighted, Kendra said, “I recognize bits from four or five different centuries. How much am I missing?”
He laughed. “I think there are another couple of centuries lurking in back. The oldest section is that fortified tower on the left side. That’s the original keep. More bits were added on as needed, and no one felt the need to be consistent. It’s a comfortable family house, not a showplace.”
No wonder she liked it. She found families more interesting than showplaces. As the coach rumbled to a stop, she smoothed her hair and tucked a stray lock out of sight in an attempt to look as respectable as possible.
Lucas stepped from the coach and offered her a hand.