wine with a nod. “Have your sexting with the stranger and do yourself a favor.”
“Do myself a favor?” I stood to follow them to the front door. “How would that be doing myself a favor?”
Immy shrugged on her sweater. “Push the button, Hannah. Flick the bean. Tiddly your winks.”
“Masturbate,” Fran said brightly as my cheeks burned. “If he wants to sext, at least get yourself something out of it.” She pulled the door open.
“I’m not—I can’t… I am not masturbating to text messages with a stranger!” I cried, following them into the front yard.
Mrs. Keighley, my next-door neighbor, was in her yard watering her flowers even though it was ten p.m. At my words, she froze, drenching one of her beloved rose bushes, then peered at me over the rim of her glasses. “I guess it depends if you know what the stranger looks like, Hannah.”
Once again, my cheeks flamed.
Were all the old people in this town damn horny?
“Oh, my God,” I breathed, darting back inside. I slammed the door on everyone and leaned against it, exhaling heavily.
There was no way I was going to sext with a stranger.
That was ridiculous.
Wasn’t it?
I was pretty sure that was how people got abducted. Like, they reeled you in with their sexy talk and then stalked you and stole you from a Walmart parking lot.
Note to self: don’t go to Walmart anymore.
I walked back into the living room and frowned at Lucifer. It was curled up on the back of the sofa, half on the closed curtain, fast asleep. The kitten opened its eyes and sneezed, sending tiny beads of snot all over the back cushion.
Lovely.
I picked up my phone and toyed with it.
I wasn’t against sexting. I’m sure people really loved it, but the thing was, I’d never done it.
That’s right. I was one week away from my twenty-sixth birthday and I’d never, ever sent a dirty text message.
I wasn’t even sure I knew how to.
I crossed the room to Lucifer and smoothed its head, whispering a goodnight. Grabbing my wine glass, I shut off all the lights and shut the door, then went up to my bedroom.
I gingerly perched on the edge of my bed. I could do this, right? I could sext. Like Fran said, I’d probably never see this guy again. It didn’t really matter that I didn’t know what he looked like.
In fact, it was for the best.
This way, I could imagine he was Liam Hemsworth or Nick Jonas or someone equally as panty-meltingly hot like that.
All right.
Nick Jonas it was.
ME: I’ve never sexted before.
His response was swift, coming seconds after I’d changed for bed.
NUMBER NEIGHBOR: Your friends left, didn’t they?
ME: Showed themselves out like the jerks they are.
NN: *laughing emoji* we all have friends like that.
NN: You’ve really never sexted before?
ME: No. Is it that unusual?
NN: I don’t know. I had a long distance relationship, so it kind of became normal for that.
ME: Never had one of those. I guess I had no need to.
NN: All right. Well, I’ll take your sexting virginity, if you’re willing.
ME: I have nothing left to lose at this point. Well, except my sexting virginity.
NN: All right. Let’s do this. I’ll start.
Let’s do this indeed.
NN: So your favorite sex position is doggy? Shoulders down or up?
ME: This is woefully unexciting if this is sexting.
NN: I’m trying to picture it in my mind so I can tell you.
ME: You don’t know what I look like.
NN: This is the only time I can justify imagining fucking Scarlett Johansson. Work with me, stranger.
ME: K, fine. You’re Nick Jonas in my head anyway.
NN: Right. Shoulders up or down?
ME: Depends how hard you’re going to pull my hair.
NN: …Up it is.
ME: I like this.
NN: What color IS your hair?
ME: Dark brown.
NN: That works. Ready for this?
ME: I don’t think I have a choice.
NN: Sure you do. But you should know that I’m already hard.
Wow. Okay. Sexting did come with perks, even if it was a stranger.
ME: This better be good. Go. Wow me.
NN: I lean forward and kiss you, putting my fingers in your hair. One hand cups the back of your neck so you can’t pull away, and I tease your lips with my tongue.
My thighs clenched together ever so slightly.
NN: You squirm against me, kissing me back. As I kiss you harder, I run my hands down your body and remove your dress, leaving it to fall at your feet. You’re wearing red underwear to match your lipstick, and I push you back toward the