as if our mouths might become permanently attached.
We pull away again. He lies back on his bed and leaves an open space for me beside him. I cuddle closely, resting my head on his shoulder. I touch my lips. They feel alive and warm.
When I glance at Milo, I find him staring up at the ceiling, frowning.
I start to shift away. “What’s wrong?”
He looks down and notices the distance I’ve put between us. He takes in a breath. “Evie, I…” He stops, and my stomach tightens as I wait for him to continue. He shakes his head and pulls me closer. His weird expression slowly disappears. “Nothing’s wrong. Come here. You okay?”
“I’m okay,” I say.
It feels really nice that I don’t have to lie. Maybe this is a good sign for me. Maybe it’s a sign that everything else will be okay too.
Footage from homemade video—February 7, 1991
*Evelyn and James are at home in Los Angeles. James has planned a huge surprise party for Evelyn’s birthday. After saying hello to their guests, Evelyn sneaks into the kitchen alcove to have a moment alone. James soon appears, recording.*
James (off camera): Happy birthday, baby! Were you surprised?
*Evelyn frowns at him and turns away, slowly breathing in and out. James sets the camera down on the kitchen table. He and Evelyn can be seen standing face-to-face. He reaches for her, but she pushes him away*
James: Peggy, what’s wrong?
Evelyn: The last thing I wanted to do was spend my birthday around people who’ve become strangers. You know how I feel about keeping our house as private as possible. I just don’t understand how you can hurt me so easily when you claim that you care about me more than anyone else.
James: Peg, babe, I’m sorry. It was just a little surprise party! I thought it would make you happy.
Evelyn: It doesn’t feel like just a little surprise. Instead, it’s like you kept this big secret from me because you wanted to throw a party even though you knew I wouldn’t like it.
James: That’s not what I was thinking at all. Hey, where are you going?
*Evelyn brushes past James and out of the camera’s line of sight*
Evelyn (off camera): Just leave me alone, please.
James: Peg, hey. Wait a minute.
*recording ends*
Chapter Nineteen
SUNDAY, AUGUST 16
A text from Kerri wakes me up in the morning.
Today’s the big day! Just landed at LaGuardia, on my way to the hotel. Your parents are on a later flight and they’ll get in a few hours before the ceremony. Meet me at my hotel in an hour for hair and makeup? I’ll send a car for you. See you soon!
I bolt upright and stare at my unfamiliar surroundings. A guitar on the floor by the bed. A Jimi Hendrix poster on the wall. Milo snoring quietly beside me.
I check the time. It’s almost 10:00 A.M.
Crap. How the heck did I manage to fall asleep here?
My mind flashes back to our kiss and how I cuddled up to Milo like a caterpillar in a cocoon.
Oh yeah. That’s how.
Last night was a nice distraction, but now it’s time to face the music. I have to tell everyone the truth about Gigi. My stomach sinks at the thought of it, but what else am I supposed to do? I have to come to terms with the fact that this movie role is not going to happen for me.
I throw myself out of the bed, and Milo doesn’t even stir. It’s a good thing he’s a heavy sleeper, because that makes this ten times less awkward. I grab his notebook, open it to a new page, and write him a note.
Sorry to leave without saying goodbye. I’m going to the Mark Hotel to meet my agent before the ceremony. See you later? —Evie
I slide on my shoes and tiptoe out into the hallway. Then I hear Raf and Ben talking in the living room. I really don’t want them to see me sneaking out. I can only imagine what they’ll say. I hover in the hallway, trying to quickly figure out the best way to slip by without them noticing. I peek around the corner and watch them.
“Last night was the best night of my life,” Raf says, sprawled out on the pullout couch. “Did you see me making out with Charisse? I knew she’d come over at some point.”
Ben nods, sitting at the table, eating a bowl of cereal. Most of his attention is focused on the paperback novel in front of him.
“And I saw