idea how I was supposed to handle things. I’d promised Cole that I’d give him space, and even though I planned on doing exactly that, I started to wonder if that wasn’t what he really wanted. In my opinion, what he’d asked for equaled no contact from me, but going no contact with him last time had made him think I didn’t care.
Is this a test of some sort?
Is he telling me to do one thing but expecting me to do the opposite?
“Laurennnnn,” I shouted from my bedroom, and I instantly heard her thundering toward me.
“Oh, finally. Please tell me what happened. You know I’m sitting out there, playing it cool, but inside, I’m dying. Fill me in!” She jumped on my bed and landed next to me, sending my pillows flying all over.
I told her what had happened. What Cole had said and how he had interpreted my silence. I’d grown so used to the shocked expression on her face that I swore it was all I saw lately.
“I actually feel really bad for him.” She looked so sad.
“I know. Me too.” I’d had no idea that Cole would take my being quiet after our breakup as my not caring about him or our relationship. Lauren pursed her lips, and I could tell she was dying to say something. “Say it.”
“Your silence. It triggered him. It’s practically textbook.”
“Okayyyyyy,” I said wearily because I knew that I’d upset him, but what did she—
“Oh my God.” I clasped my hand over my mouth as it all hit me. “His mom.”
Lauren nodded slowly and repeated, “His mom.”
I wouldn’t have said anything about Cole’s mom or even brought her up if Lauren hadn’t already known about it. It wasn’t my story to tell, but she had found out about it a couple of years back and asked me if it was true. She’d said that it was pretty common knowledge around campus, but I’d never heard anyone talking about it before.
“It makes perfect sense that he would react like that. I should have put it together.” She snapped her fingers in the air. “I am a psych major after all.” She sounded annoyed with herself for not catching the signs.
“To be fair, you did tell me to reach out to him.”
“I know, but if I had told you that your silence might trigger his issues, you might have actually listened to me,” she explained before we both started laughing because I still wouldn’t have reached out, and we both knew it.
“No, I wouldn’t have.” I shifted on the bed and tucked my feet underneath my body. “Is it bad that I forgot all about his mom? He never talks about her.”
“You couldn’t have known. It’s easy to put your issues away when you aren’t being provoked by them.”
I swallowed, feeling the weight of this conversation and topic. I realized that Cole had probably always felt abandoned on some level. And that I had unknowingly contributed to that by staying away from him when he needed me to stay.
“Okay, so now that we’ve put all that together, what do I do?”
“Obviously, you fight for him,” she said like I was an idiot.
“Of course I’m going to fight for him. But I mean, what do I do right now? He told me to give him time, but I’m afraid he doesn’t really want it. But he looked like he meant it when he said it. But what if he didn’t?”
I felt insane. Trying to read Cole’s mind was exhausting, and I kept spinning in circles, overthinking and questioning everything until Lauren put her hand on my shoulder.
“Just send him a text. Tell him that you’re giving him space, but you want him to know you’re not going anywhere.”
“Yeah, that sounds good.” I nodded as I reached for my phone, and it vibrated in my hand, surprising me. “Ah,” I said as I dropped it.
Lauren bent down to pick it up off the floor, and she couldn’t help but glance at the screen. “Speak of the devil,” she said before handing it to me. “Read it out loud,” she demanded.
I read his text to myself first before doing as she’d asked. “It just says, Come to my game tomorrow?”
“What are you going to say?” Lauren was literally bouncing on the bed, and my fingers kept skirting over the keypad as I tried to write him back.
“I told him I was already planning on it,” I said with a smile because I had been.
Even if Cole hadn’t