her in my bed until September. Didn’t make her mine for a few more months. Yomp, sometimes, I’m why things take forever to get good.
Turning forty means I already spent four decades waiting for this life with Shelby. I ain’t got the patience to wait for everything to come together anymore.
The house is real in my head, but it’ll be at least a year before it’s real enough to live in. Shelby put my ideas into a building plan, and we’ve already dug a well for our future plumbing. The process is moving along, but not fast enough. I see how slowly River’s house is going. He won’t be moved in until fall. But I figure he’s still young enough to be patient.
Besides, he’s already got his little girl, and I have a bunch of months left before I get to hold mine. There are times when I wake up and roll over to wrap myself around Shelby. My hand goes to her bump, and I feel my daughter kicking me. In those moments, I can barely wait to meet her. But some things can’t be rushed.
I don’t trust my fathering skills. Never had one to learn from, and I spent forty years not knowing anything about babies or kids. But now I’m surrounded by little people. I figure I’ll practice on them. Well, I didn’t think of that idea, but Shelby put it in my head, and she’s usually right.
I start by helping Shelby babysit Iggy, who’s bigger and less likely to start bawling. The kid talks to me about shit I don’t understand. That’s normal, I guess. He’s got a lot to say but doesn’t know the words.
I get like that sometimes with Shelby. My heart feels all kinds of shit that I can’t express to her. I hope she understands, and I suspect she’d mention something if she didn’t. That’s the good thing about loving a bossy woman. She won’t suffer in silence. She’ll either speak up or plot to get her way.
At first, Iggy gets a little scared when I pick him up. I can’t imagine he’s up much higher than when his dad or River hold him. Maybe he’s just scared of me.
Nomp, he tugs on my beard like we’re old friends. Not an ounce of fear. When I smile at him, he smiles back. Kids ain’t as tricky as I thought.
Iggy helps me with his brother. That first time I change a diaper, Shelby laughs so hard that she needs to piss. Ramona gets so nervous she looks ready to faint. Iggy, though, hands me a diaper and babbles a whole bunch of instructions. I’d seen it done enough to know the gist, but his confidence in my skills helps.
Ozzy survives his diaper change, and Shelby finishes giggling long enough to ask to see me naked at our little box house. We’re rarely there, but it’s close enough for us to visit for fucking a few times a day.
Violet is why Shelby sticks closer to the Victorian. The girl can’t really go anywhere, what with her supposed to be dead. People are gonna recognize her eventually. We take her to a doctor over the border in Ohio. Back in Kentucky, we find a dentist a few towns over. We use the name Vi Campbell on the paperwork. That won’t work forever.
“She’s one of River’s sisters,” Shelby says when a neighbor asks too many questions about Violet during a walk around the neighborhood.
With her wearing a hat and sunglasses, Violet can pass for one of the Majors. And people around Shasta know River’s sisters ain’t the kind of women to mess with. That neighbor walks away real quick.
Again, this tactic is only gonna work for a while. A few people in Shasta knew Violet personally. One day, one of them will see her, and there won’t be explaining away the resemblance.
That’s why Violet mostly stays at the Victorian. The upside to having so many people packed into the creepy house is that she’s never alone. This is important to her, even if she won’t admit it.
Often, Shelby and Violet sit out back, talking about whatever women talk about. I think it’s mostly just Shelby telling stories. Violet doesn’t want to talk about anything related to what happened with O’Meara. She never says anything about her parents’ murder-suicide in this house. Violet is living deep in denial. Shelby thinks that’s a mistake, but she grew up in a family where people felt safe.